Page 10 of Summer Storms

He looked as if he didn’t believe her. “And yet you have achieved everything you ever wanted? I don’t think you are as shatter-brained as others think.”

He looked at her in an almost admiring way, which felt strange. It made her want to blush, but Christine refused to let that happen. She changed the subject to what was currently on her mind.

“I didn’t realise until now how much I missed my family. Missed everything here, really.” She gave an awkward laugh. “Before I couldn’t wait to leave Barton Lacey, and here I am being nostalgic about it. Did you feel like that when you went to London? To your uncle?”

He considered the question. “I was excited, certainly, but I was also worried about leaving my family behind. I knew how they were struggling, so I sent every penny I could save home to them. When my uncle realised how desperate our circumstances were, he started to help them too. He admitted he had been a selfish man, more concerned about his own life and business than his relatives.”

Was he drawing comparisons between his uncle and Christine? He was looking at her as if he might be.

She looked away. She supposed she had been selfish, but she’d had to be in order to succeed. Did her family see her as selfish? They were proud of her, so she hoped not. But perhaps it was time to prove that she really did love them. Somehow.

“I do hope that everything goes well,” she said quietly, more to herself than to him.

To her surprise, Zek reached over and took her hand, giving it a squeeze before releasing it. He didn’t offer her useless platitudes or false promises, but at that moment the touch of his gloved hand on hers had been comfort enough.

CHAPTER SIX

Ansford Keep was abuzz with excitement and filled with an undercurrent of concern. Zek joined Reeve and Abby’s father downstairs for a stiff drink.

As their voices drifted back, Christine could hear Sir Stephen offering Reeve the benefit of his experience. She supposed he had plenty of advice to give, having had so many children of his own. Lady Meg was with Abby and the doctor, and several servants were bustling about with hot water and towels, keeping busy.

Christine remembered the night Nigel was born. She hadn’t thought much of it at the time, only that there was a great to-do and then the next morning she was called into her parents’ bedchamber to meet the red-faced baby tucked away in the crib. None of it had been very exciting to her mind, and she was glad when she was allowed to go about her business. But that red-faced babe had grown into Nigel, whom she now loved to bits, and she could not imagine a world without him in it.

It was a long night of waiting and tending to her sister’s every need, and it was almost dawn by the time Abby’s son was finally born. Anticipation had kept most of them awake, while others had dozed off and on.

Christine had found something productive to do, ensuring that there was plenty to eat and drink as the hours dragged by. She even managed a few naps. When she went upstairs to say her first hello to her new nephew, she found her sister pale and exhausted, but content, her child held safely in her arms. Reeve was there as well, clasping Abby’s hand, looking as if Christmas had come early this year.

Christine unexpectedly felt very emotional. “Congratulations! I am so happy for you both!”

Abby looked at her, tears welling up in her blue eyes. “Thank you, Christine.” She suddenly added, “Would you like to hold him for a moment?”

Christine hesitated. She was a little worried she might accidentally drop the precious bundle. She almost had with Nigel long ago. But Abby was holding him out, and it felt churlish and ridiculous to refuse. So she took the babe into her arms and held him. He was warm and very small, and when she peeped down into his face, he looked as red-faced as Nigel had been, his eyes closed.

“Oh,” she whispered aloud in wonder. To her surprise, he opened his eyes and looked up at her in an unfocused sort of way. She thought he might suddenly cry, but he didn’t. She wasn’t sure if he could really see her, but this moment felt very special.

“He knows you are his aunt.” Zek’s voice was close by, but she hadn’t heard him come into the room.

“Do you think so?” she said softly, still gazing at the baby’s perfect face. She already loved him.

“He is thinking of all the nice things he is going to ask you for when he grows up. And I have no doubt you will indulge his every whim.”

That made Christine smile.

Reeve came to retrieve his son, unable to keep his own smile off his face. He had always wanted a family of his own, and now he had one. He and Abby would be such good parents, though at the moment Abby looked as if she was about to fall into a deep slumber.

“We should leave them to rest,” Christine said to Zek, moving toward the door. She glanced back and saw Reeve sitting with the baby, his gaze focused on Abby. Her eyes stung with tears, but they were happy ones. There was so much love in the room right now.

Zek closed the door behind them. “I never thought I would want children,” he said, following on from their earlier conversation. “At times, my own family felt more like a burden than a joy. But seeing Reeve and Abby... Perhaps I’ve changed my mind.”

Christine’s eyes met his. “I think it is different for a woman,” she said as they made their way to the top of the stairs. “Not just because of the risk involved but how would I manage my career? How can I walk the stage with a child on my hip? Or learn my lines when I am interrupted by a crying baby every five minutes?”

Zek frowned. “So you must choose one or the other? That seems quite unfair, Christine.”

He was right. It was unfair. She had been so single-minded about her career she had never thought about a life outside of it. All her life she’d wanted nothing more than to act upon one of London’s famous stages, to be famous. It was generally assumed that a woman having a child wasn’t able to continue to take on roles in the theatre. But Madame Vestris was married and had children, although of course she was famous. All the same, why should Christine automatically miss out on a family if she ever achieved her dream?

These thoughts went deeper and were more emotional than she wished to deal with right now. Seeking to lighten the moment, she said, “I have not met any man in London I would wish to marry, so it most likely does not matter.”

His eyebrows lifted in a mocking way. “Are all the gentlemen in London so hideous? I cannot say I noticed when I was there.”