Page 175 of John + Siena: The Complete Duet

John’s throat tightened at the thought.

“Blackmail, you mean,” John said to Leonard.

The therapist chuckled. “Well, that’s a language you understand, isn’t it? Men like us always understand the language of blackmail.”

Men like us.

Criminals.

Living in shades of gray, and never black and white.

John knew there was a reason his father suggested this facility, and pushed his son to take the opening when it was offered. Something other than the prestigious name, expensive price tag, and privacy it offered.

“Talk?” Leonard asked.

“If I answer one, can I ask one?”

The white-haired man smiled. “I can’t promise to answer, John.”

“Yeah, me either.”

“Tell me, I know you struggled to agree to voluntarily check yourself in this facility. Why is that?”

John swallowed the knot in his throat. “Because everything I have worked to keep from the public would be exposed.”

“Being bipolar?”

He only gave a nod. “My turn. Who are you?”

The man raised one thick eyebrow. “A man who used to be someone entirely different, John.”

“And my father knew who you were before?”

“It’s my turn.”

Shit.

“Yeah,” John said, “I guess it is.”

“Why hide your disorder?”

“Would you want to be known as the disgrace of your family?”

Leonard coughed gently. “Is that how you see your disorder?”

“Bit self-deprecating, isn’t it? That typically isn’t my style.”

“And yet …”

John shrugged one shoulder. “It’s my one thing.”

“Have you ever taken a good look around at your family, Johnathan? Have you looked at the structure of support and unconditional love they’ve built around you? Do you know that your father calls me every day just to make sure you have had one single good day? I know that it is sometimes easier to alienate yourself away from those you love because it’s simpler.”

“I hurt them. All the time.”

“Not all the time.”

That was up for debate.