Page 93 of Chris

Their loss, he supposed.

His gain.

“I never learned what it meant to enjoy being with someone emotionally, or physically. Love was always abusive. Sex only hurt. I never had the chance to figure out what I wanted and what was good for me until you, and this isn’t even a thing. It’s not right, we shouldn’t have done this, but I’m not sure what I’m supposed to do when you go. I can’t let him touch me, anymore. I can’t—”

“Shhh,” Chris murmured, leaning down just enough to press a kiss to her forehead. Valeria’s eyes fluttered closed, and her frown melted away. That was better. “Val, listen—”

“I don’t want you to leave.”

Yeah.

There it was.

“I don’t want to go, either,” he muttered.

He needed to be here. Someone had to keep an eye on this woman because no one else was doing it. Undoubtedly, leaving would kill him inside when it meant she would face hell alone. Yes, she had been doing it for years before him, but that didn’t matter to him at all.

She shouldn’t have to.

“What do you want?” he asked.

Valeria looked away from him. “I don’t understand.”

“When this is over, and you can do whatever you want to do, what is it you want?”

“Still not sure when that’ll happen, Chris.”

Right.

“Part of hope is having something to hope for,” he murmured against her cheek, letting his nose nuzzle her soft, warm skin. “So, what are you hoping for, Val?”

She stayed quiet.

He waited her out.

“You,” she said. “I’m hoping for you, and what you gave me here. I don’t want to forget it when you’re gone, I don’t think I can because I’m hoping for something better, and that’s you.”

Chris tightened his arms around her trembling form because, all too soon, he would let her go again. “You’ll have that. I promise.”

He didn’t break those.

He wouldn’t.

“Will I? How?”

Asking her to trust him again—how many times had he said that now?—didn’t seem like it was what she wanted, and so Chris said nothing at all. Actions were still louder than words, and he was working on making this a reality one fucking step at a time. It was the best he could do right now.

His silence wasn’t the response she wanted either. Valeria turned in his lap, the blanket around them falling to the stall floor before she was straddling him. Her hands found his face, and those sharp fingernails of her dragged teasingly against his skin as she pulled him in for a hard kiss. There was no give to it—only her taking.

He didn’t care.

She wanted it?

Have it.

In the back of his mind, Chris recognized they were running out of time here. She needed to head back to the house before someone noticed she left. Or even, before a guard made a trip through the stables just because.

And yet, all those thoughts faded away when her hands fell between them. Her palms found his cock, grabbing tight and stroking him alive in a few firm pulls. He didn’t speak the truth—that she needed to go—when her lips still crushed against his, and her tongue seemed intent to lick his flavor straight from his fucking mouth.