Page 31 of Cross + Catherine: The Companion

Catherine couldn’t remember the last time she actually came to a party to deal like she was supposed to. So far, her cousins hadn’t figured out a lot of the shit she was doing. Partying, and whatever else.

She knew the moment Andino or John learned that she had fallen into this abyss, the first thing they would do would be pull her back out of it.

She wasn’t ready for that yet.

She didn’t want to deal with that yet.

She couldn’t deal with herself, yet.

Someone called her name from within the crowd of drunken teenagers, but she didn’t know who. Catherine waved a hand high, figuring that would be enough.

It wasn’t like she came here to talk.

She didn’t get drunk to be social.

Now, she didn’t want to be anything at all.

Catherine tried to remember how many times this month alone that she had gotten drunk, high, or both. It was a bigger number then she cared to admit.

It was a problem.

She knew that.

But what could she do?

How could she stop?

This was easier.

So much easier.

Catherine weaved through the people, and found her way back into the hallways. She found a staircase that let to the upstairs of a house that she didn’t recognize.

Whose place was this, anyway?

Who fucking knew?

Not her.

She didn’t care, either.

Catherine found one room upstairs that wasn’t being used by someone else. It looked like a bedroom, not that she cared. She closed the door, and dug out the cell phone from her purse. For a long while, she only stared at the black screen.

She was too drunk, too high …

Way too fucked up.

She should have called her father, or mother. She came here to forget and not feel, but the only thing she could think about was how bad she didn’t want to be there anymore.

Funny how that worked.

She should have called someone and asked for help. It was the only thing her parents asked of her, really. They knew something was wrong, but they didn’t know how to deal with it. They no longer knew how to deal with her.

Catherine understood that all too well.

She no longer knew how to deal with herself.

And worse was when she was like this, when she was so lost like this, there was only one thing she knew to do. There was only one person who could make her feel slightly better when she was like this.

Was it selfish?

Did she care?

There was only one person she cared to call. He always answered. He was always saving her. Even when she hurt him.

Cross.