Page 231 of Show Me

My handwriting wobbles.

Her perfectly made-up face scrunches with irritation. “Keep going.”

I write slowly, dragging out every word. Buying time.

Why did I never suspect it was her? Was I so egotistical that I couldn’t imagine the person not being infatuated with me? That’s pathetic. All this time, I was looking in the wrong direction.

I just couldn’t take it anymore.

Think. Observe. Wait.

The gun hangs more loosely in Lindsey’s hand now. She thinks she's already won. My phone buzzes on the counter. Neither of us moves.

“You should’ve told him to leave when I warned you.” The gun swings to the right as she talks.

“I left.”

“But he didn’t.” Bitterness cuts through her voice. “He kept coming back.” She laughs softly. “You know when I realized how bad it was?”

I keep my eyes on the paper. “When?”

“I opened your dresser.” Fine lines deepen at the corners of her eyes, makeup settling into the creases.

My pen stops.

“His clothes were inside.” Her gaze sweeps around the kitchen. “Like he lived here. This house. Your animals. Your routines.”

The gun rises. “You made him care.”

My throat tightens as another wave of nausea rolls through me. My eyes flick toward the pill bottle. No. She isn't making me take those.

My phone buzzes again. Someone is looking for me. Keep her talking. My brain starts calculating. Distance. Angle. The chair beneath me.

If I throw it…. One wrong move and she fires. Not yet. I lower my head and add another line.

I hope someday you understand that this wasn’t what I wanted, but what I had to do.

I pause, then write:

Please take care of Squirt and the pigs.

Lindsey reads over my shoulder. “Good.”

I almost sag with relief. Because Bella and Emily will know. I would never leave my animals behind. If I can't get out of this, they'll know I didn't write this letter because I wanted to die.

A sudden squeal erupts outside. Samson. Another follows, louder and agitated.

Then…. Thud. Something hits the porch steps.

Lindsey’s head turns toward the back door. My pulse explodes. Please. Please let someone be out there.

Her gun dips. And for the first time since I walked into the kitchen, Lindsey isn’t watching me.

Chapter One Hundred Twenty-Three

Ruby

It was the mailman leaving a package. No knock. No calling out. I opened my mouth once, and Lindsey leveled the gun at my head.