Page 175 of Lost Trust

I hate that I spent so many years wrapped up in that kind of toxic bullshit with him.

But I also know better than to hate myself for it.

We were young.

We were stupid.

And back then, I thought I knew what love was.

I didn’t.

Not even close.

My gaze drops to Ryder.

He’s sitting on the floor with his toy bull, making it buck while he narrates every move.

“Mommy! Look! My balance is getting better!”

I smile.

God, I love this little boy.

He’s the best thing that ever came out of that relationship.

And I don’t regret him.

Not for one second.

“I don’t regret us,” I tell Blaze quietly.

His eyes lift to mine.

I nod toward Ryder. “Look what we made together.”

Blaze follows my gaze.

“He’s here because of us. And I wouldn’t trade him for anything. Not you. Not my old life. Not my career. Nothing.”

Blaze’s jaw tightens.

“He’s a perfect little boy,” I continue. “And he’s everything you should want. He idolizes you.”

Something flickers across his face.

Pain maybe.

Regret.

I can’t tell.

“I hope, someday, you see that.” I hold his gaze. “Because if you don’t, you’re going to miss out on him. And that’s something you’ll never get back.”

For once, he doesn’t have a comeback.

I take a breath. “The door is always open for you to fix your relationship with your son.”

I let the words settle between us.