Page 64 of Studfinder

“What were you thinking?” I’m yelling at him before he even exits his car in the driveway. My truck door slammed so hard, the sound still echoes in the yard.

Nolan stares up at me, half in, half out of his vehicle. “I was there for you,” he states like it’s perfectly natural. Like he’s always been there for me.

“Nolan, stop doing me favors, okay?”

“What the fuck?” he snarls up at me.

“That was a ruse. Rita wanted you to turn yourself in.”

“That bitch,” Nolan huffs. However, his defensive tone turns my allegiance.

“She’s not a bitch. She did it for—” The truth slams into me. She did it for me. She wanted to free me from my sentence, but she shouldn’t have gone about it how she did. She should have talked to me, asked me what I wanted to do.

“I told you attorneys were snakes.”

“You watch your mouth,” I bark at Nolan, pointing a finger at him. For the first time ever, Nolan stops and stares at me like he doesn’t recognize me. I hardly recognize myself. That’s been the problem for seven years. I don’t know who I am anymore, but I can’t do this. I can’t keep protecting Nolan.

“Rita . . .” I pause, realizing I’m not exactly laying blame where it belongs. “I could have turned you in, Nolan. If you confessed, my sentence could be wiped free. I could walk away with the conviction struck from my record.”

Nolan’s face turns white once more.

“I could go to jail,” he whispers as if he never understood the depths of the consequences. He committed a crime. He killed an innocent man. He could have gone to jail seven years ago.

Rita. Oh God, my stomach clenches for her all over again. She only wants justice. She wants the right person to pay for taking the love of her life from her.

“I’m not turning you in, Nolan. I’m not offering you up or pressing any kind of charges, but you’re still going to pay for what you’ve done.”

“How?” His head lifts, panic in his expression.

“I haven’t decided yet, but I’m going to find something.” I pause, taking a deep breath. “In the meantime, I’m moving out.”

“Why?” His eyes widen.

“Because you don’t need me, Nolan. You’re self-sufficient here, and frankly, I don’t want to live with you. No offense, little brother, but right now, I’m having a hard time looking at you.”

“Because of Rita,” Nolan bites, color returning to his face.

“Yes, because of Rita. Don’t make me choose, Nolan, because it’s going to be her.” I can hardly believe the words leaving my lips, but it’s true. If I thought I’d stay in this godforsaken area, it would be for one reason only. Rita.

“Just like you chose Lisa.”

“What?” I glare at my brother, uncertain what he’s said.

“You picked her over me.”

“What are you talking about?”

“You left me behind.”

I stare at my brother. Unbelievable. “I was in love. I married her. I didn’t leave you. You were an adult by then, Nolan. Capable of taking care of yourself. In fact, you needed to fucking grow up.” Jesus, he’d been twenty-three when I married Lisa. Why is this coming up now?

“I don’t want to be left behind.”

Staring at my brother in his chair, I should feel sorry for him. I want to feel something for him. He’s my brother. I love him, but right now, I hate him. He did this to himself. I coddled him too much by filling in for our father, compensating for our mother, and even taking over when he wasn’t fit to father his own son.

“I’m not leaving you behind, Nolan, but I need separation from you.”

“Where will you go?” he asks, and I glance up at the garage, full of my supplies and scraps, waiting for more sculptures to be made.