Page 31 of The Heart Remembers

“Hey,” I whisper, my voice still no more than a croak. I’m embarrassed, but I’m more turned on than anything else, and the conflict of emotions leaves me rattled.

“Dad wanted me to find you. He’s worried about what happened earlier.”

Good cover, I consider. “He already asked me about it, and I told him I was fine. Levi and I knocked into each other when we flipped, but I was fine. I just scared Levi a little bit.”

I’d take a bullet for her if I needed to. Jesus, who says that? Then again, my insides did a giddy backflip with the protective declaration. Levi’s tone turned deadly serious. He meant every word.

“What’s going on with you two?” Mom questions, her voice hesitant. Her brows pinch, expressing her concern.

“I don’t know,” I admit, tipping back my head. “I’ve had a crush on him forever, and this reunion has brought up some old feelings.”

Mom brushes my hair off my shoulder and nervously smiles. “Don’t you think it’s a little soon after breaking up with Derek?”

“I think Levi is just what I needed.” Our spontaneous combustion shows me what I’ve been wanting for too long and missing too often with Derek.

“He’s also . . . fragile. I don’t want you to use him.”

“Mom,” I groan. “I’d never do that to him.” If anything, I’m the one allowing myself to be used because Levi’s leaving on Sunday. I might not see him again until the next family function, and who knows when that will be.

“I just want you to be careful. Both of you.”

I stare at her, uncertain what to say, uncertain how to explain what I feel inside, and equally afraid to admit what I think I feel. I’m in love with Levi Walker, maybe even more so than I was as a little girl. Definitely more so than a silly crush on someone unobtainable and older than me. We’re both adults now. The playing field is different.

“You know, one of the first times I met your father’s family was during a party at Uncle Tom’s.” She looks up at the side of the house and then down the side yard protected from view of the back lawn. “Your dad brought me right here and kissed me just like I saw you kissing Levi.”

“Mom,” I croon. It’s bad enough sometimes that my parents are still madly in love with each other and don’t hide it from anyone. They're affectionate and don’t hold back on the PDA. Thankfully, they don’t take it to the most embarrassing moments. I’ve seen my parents kiss, and while I’d typically turn away, there were times when my heart ached for what they had . . . still have. Deep down, I didn’t ever think I’d have that with Derek. Levi feels like a different story. A new story where the heroine saves the prince, not the other way around. It would be one of my mother’s favorite fairy tales.

“I can’t say I knew at that moment that I was in love with him, but I knew that I didn’t want to walk away from him either. I wanted to be part of this family. I wanted what they all had. Love. Connection. Commitment to one another. You have that from us, but we also want it for you with a partner.” Mom swipes back my hair again. “If Derek showed up promising all those things, would you take him back?”

It’s a strange question, considering she just caught me kissing Levi. Not to mention, I’ve already told her about Derek and me. I broke up with him, and I’m comfortable with that decision.

I shake my head without answering her.

“If you promised those things to Levi, I bet he’d jump at the chance.”

“That’s a little backward,” I say, as she’s just mentioned Derek promising things to me.

“Yes, but Levi needs those things. He has Tricia and Leon, but he’s never fully believed he deserves them. He wants a family, love, connection, commitment as well.” She tips her head. “You need to be careful with him. With his heart.”

I nod as I lower my head, understanding that Levi has a stake in whatever we’re doing just as much as I do.

“We all want a hero in life. My guess is, you would be Levi’s.”

My head snaps up, and I look at my mom softly smiling at me with pride and fear. She doesn’t want me hurt. She doesn’t want Levi hurt. But she has to let us make our own mistakes, if that’s what’s happening.

Then again, what if it’s not?

+ + +

What a day.

Curled up in my bed, I am too wound up to sleep, so I lie on my side, staring out the open window and listening to the lake lull against the boulders at the shore. Earlier, Levi mentioned the other night, reminding me of his mouth on me, and I just cannot get out of my head how much I want a repeat. I want to feel his tongue on me and touch him with my own. My eyes close with lustful thoughts. Then, a soft knock comes to the bedroom door before it slowly opens.

“Hey, you still awake?” Levi whispers, although it’s clear from my shifting on the bed, I’m not sleeping.

“Yeah. You okay?”

Levi walks to the edge of my bed and stares down at me. The moonlight somewhere outside is the only light in the room, but I notice he’s holding the baby monitor in his hand. I’d like to think it’s a hint he wants to spend some time in my room.