Page 7 of The History in Us

“Uh.” The sound escaped before I questioned what I was doing. The noise was made in jest as I picked up AJ, but when I turned to face Katie, the expression on her innocent face spurred me onward. Inappropriate. Unnecessary. Completely warranted. If I was going to be accused of doing something naughty, it was going to sound naughty in the bathroom stall. My hips gyrated forward despite holding AJ in order to emphasis my intentions. I pinned Katie with my glare.

“Uh, uh.” I thrust forward again disguising it with a step toward her.

“Uh, uh.” Katie's back hit the stall, palms flattening against the metal, and the door rattled. We didn’t touch, but our eyes carried on a conversation—hers begging me to stop, while laughter bubbled inside her and mine encouraging her to play along, feeling naughty like a schoolboy. I moaned deeply, closing my eyes, momentarily forgetting AJ and imagining Katie pinned against the stall with me buried deep inside her. My eyes sprang open instantly, reminding me that I held AJ, but enjoying the mischievousness of teasing Katie. Her mouth formed a perfect circle, and visions of what her sweet mouth might do to parts of me wrestled in my head.

“Oh.” The sound escaped her, the timing impeccable, surprising us both. It was my turn to struggle with laughter, her expression too funny—a mixture of innocent freckles and round eyes glinting with playful deception.

“Are you all right in there?” I'd shortened the distance between us and the door rattled at Katie's back as someone banged on the other side. She squeaked at the movement behind her, her breath hitching like I imagine it might upon entrance into her. A shock, swift and sharp. Her typically soft voice responded breathlessly. “I'm fine.”

Those were two of the worst words combined in the English language. My eyes squinted in question.Finewas in opposition to the Katie Carter I remembered. She’d been sweet, bold, willful. The combination of words pissed me off. My face pressed closer to hers and I whispered toward her ear.

“Those are my least favorite words.” A flirtatious warning of things better left unsaid, her already-wide eyes opened even wider, and that lake blue color begged me to jump into the deep end. She was the type of girl who could refresh me, and I wanted to dive in. The squirming baby in my arms brought reality crashing back.

“He has my hair.” Hushed and husky, her voice did nothing to lessen the wayward thoughts in my head. Plump little digits curled over straw-colored strands and she tucked a finger inside his tight grip to remove tiny fingers. His small hand wrapped around her index instead, and a pinch of something strangely similar to jealousy caught my breath. I refused to be jealous of my son, but I wanted her hands on me.

The door rattled one more time, and Katie flinched.

“Are you sure you're okay in there?”

“I'm...” Katie’s deep blues pierced me. Her hesitation was part of her good-girl aura. “I'll be finished in a second.”

“Wrong again,” I breathed against her cheek, while I inhaled skin I imagined sweaty and sweet from our predicament. Her index finger was still within AJ’s grasp, but our faces were closer. Our position familiar, a tidal wave of memory washed over me. I could kiss her, I thought.

“What's the question?” She mouthed innocently as I watched her lips, and I almost said,go out with me. But AJ kicked and the silence of the bathroom signaled we were alone. Escape was timely.Retreat, retreat,echoed in my head. I stepped back abruptly and a new expression was written over Katie's sweet face—dread.We made a mistake, it said. I recognized the writing. I’d read it earlier in the summer and something inside me sealed up again.