Page 199 of Lose You Twice

Kai smiles gently. “It was my least favorite.”

I chuckle as he opens the shower door, and I step inside.

“I’ll be back in a few minutes. Think you’ll be okay?”

I nod, letting the hot water hit my body, relaxing my muscles. “Yeah, I’ll be good.”

“Okay. I love you,” he says, backing toward the door and grabbing the soiled clothes from the floor. “Yell if you need me. I’ll leave the door cracked so I can hear you.”

He leaves, and the tears start up again.

It feels so good to have someone taking care of me for once. It feels like I’ve been stuck in a whirlpool of give, give, give—putting everyone before myself, neglecting my own needs.

But you can only pour out of an empty cup for so long before it starts to crack. Before resentment toward those you care for and love so much starts to surface.

I love my family so much. I truly do, but being shoved into the role of a caretaker when I’m still trying to figure out my own life and juggle so many different things at once is weighing on me heavier by the day.

My cup is cracking, has cracked, and the only person who seems to want to patch it back up is Kai.

He wants to help me carry the load. He wants to take some of the burden. He wants to take care of me. He wants to love me.

He does it all so well, even with so many of his own responsibilities weighing on him.

Maybe that’s why we work so well together. We’re both strong on our own, but together we’re unbreakable.

Minutes pass, and Kai comes back in to check on me, carrying a cup of water and some Advil.

I turn off the shower, gladly accepting the pills as he wraps a towel around me.

“Do you want to try a bath right now? Or wait?” he asks, setting the cup of water on the counter by the sink.

“A bath sounds good,” I say. “What time is it anyway?”

“A little past three.”

My eyes bulge. “I am so sorry.”

He shakes off my apology. “You have nothing to be sorry for.”

Kai gets the bath going, dumping in a good amount of the Epsom salt before I get in. I sit, relaxing against the back of the tub.

He smiles softly. “Feel good?”

“Yes, thank you.”

“You don’t need to thank me, Freckles.” He stands, moving toward the door. “I’ll be back in a few, okay?”

Closing my eyes, I nod, doing my best to let the warm water ease the aching.

At some point I must fall asleep, because the next thing I know, Kai is back, gently trying to wake me up.

“You must be feeling a little better?”

I sit up, causing the water to slosh slightly. “Yeah, it definitely helped.”

“Good.” He smiles. “I ran down to the gas station really quick; it was the only thing open. I looked in your bag first, but I didn’t see any supplies, so I figured you’d need some,” he says, grabbing the bag at his feet and opening it before pulling out two boxes.

He holds them up toward me. “I didn’t know if you used the same ones from high school or if that changes as you get older, so I just grabbed a box of tampons and a box of pads. Don’t blame me if I got the wrong ones; there wasn’t exactly a large selection.” He sets the boxes on the floor before rummaging more in the bag. “Also grabbed a couple of these.”