Page 84 of Love Limits

“You mean like that one? What’s it called?”

“Hungry, Hungry Hippos.”

“Well, I don’t have that one. I have a puzzle, though. And I think there’s a chess set that has checkers pieces in it.”

That was disappointing. They’d mentioned during the last date that they liked games. But that was being ungrateful. The reason Josh had taken so long for their second date was because he’d had to travel, so it wasn’t like he had time to go shopping. Even if he hadn’t, expecting him to buy things for them was being greedy.

“I have lots of other toys, though. And some art supplies, which I know you like.”

Alright, he had been listening. It was just… he wasn’t Zhong.

“Hey, um, this might sound weird, but would you mind if your little had, like, another Caregiver? I mean, not like another Daddy, but like, an Uncle or something?”

“You mean that you would want to regress with someone else sometimes?”

“Yeah.” They’d talked about sexual exclusivity if they were dating, and even orgasm control, but had somehow not addressed this aspect.

“Is this someone specific?”

“My best friend.” It was true, though it felt weird to say. Especially since Ash knew that Zhong’s best friend was Dustin. Or maybe both of them, now? Where exactly did Ash rank? “He’s kind of my… stand-in Daddy for right now. We spend a lot of time together.”

“How much time?”

“I mean, regressing? Not very often.” Exactly once, to be precise. Maybe more if Ash was very, very lucky. “But we hang out maybe three or four nights a week?”

“Oh. Is he your house mate?”

“Uh, no. I spend the night at his place sometimes though. It’s much closer to where I work.”

Josh gave them a funny look. “Are you… no, I’m not going to ask that. I trust that you would have said something before if you were sleeping with someone else.”

“Well, technically I sleep in his bed, but he’s asexual. So it’s purely platonic.” Was it, though? Platonic meant friendly, and romantic didn’t mean sexual and… ugh.

Ash was firmly out of little space now. They hadn’t meant to bring this all up. But now that Josh, the quintessential Daddy, was sitting in front of them, one thing was abundantly clear: they could only really start something with Josh if they knew they didn’t have to give Zhong up. “He’s very important to me,” they concluded.

“I can see that. It sounds like you’re very lucky to have him. And he’s very lucky to have you.” Josh gave them a special smile.

“So, um, is that OK with you? If I still spend a lot of time with him and maybe regress occasionally?”

“I have to be honest and say that exclusivity and commitment is pretty important to me. Every other relationship I’ve been in has been monogamous for everything. If I were your Daddy, I would want you to come to me for all of your needs. But…” He tapped his fingers on the table, looking off at the ceiling before he returned. “I’d also never want my little to have to stop spending time with the important people in their life.”

“Maybe if I met him,” Josh continued, “and I could see that he wasn’t really, I don’t know, competition for the role of Daddy, it wouldn’t bother me.”

Ash had a sinking feeling in their stomach. Zhong was definitely Daddy competition. Zhong wouldn’t see it that way, of course. But Josh would.

“He’s, um, kind of a Daddy type. Just not, you know, my Daddy.” Unfortunately.

“I think I need to think about that,” Josh finally concluded. “I mean, I want you to have a lot of healthy friendships and continue being close to the people you care about now.” He sounded like he was backpedaling.

The food sat heavy in Ash’s belly. This was stupid not to mention on the first date. But then, on the first date, Ash hadn’t yet known that Daddy Zhong would blow raspberries on their belly and cut their Klondike bars into squares so they could have all the flavors.

They ate another fry, for distraction, but it was cold and soggy, the grease waxy on their fingers. They forced down a few bites of the sandwich instead, which was at least still warm.

“Hey,” Josh caught their attention. “Let’s just enjoy this evening. We’re still getting to know each other and I’ve liked everything about you so far. So we can communicate about this like everything else, and I’m not ruling anything out. Alright? I want you to have a good evening and I think we really have a spark. Let’s see where it takes us.”

“Yeah, sounds good.” He was right. And he really did have all of the Daddy moves down, supporting and soothing, while getting them back on track.

“How about this? Have a few more bites of your sandwich and we can go check out the playroom. Maybe you can make me a picture for my wall.” Josh put his hand over Ash’s, letting them feel the comfort and warmth. “Give yourself the chance to let go for a bit with me. I think you need it.”