Page 24 of Love Limits

Ugh. I guess you’re right. I just don’t want to choose.

I’ll surprise you, then. He already knew what he’d give them though. He toasted a slice of bread while he started the rice maker and washed vegetables.

He turned his back for a moment to prepare the toast, then set it down with a flourish. Strawberry rhubarb jam. I made it myself last summer from the rhubarb in the garden. When Ash acted like he was a hero for making them food, it made him want to show off a little bit. He loved feeding people.

Or maybe he liked the idea of Ash eating things that he’d grown and made with his own hands.

When they took their first bite of bread, they practically swooned in their chair. Zhong grinned.

I’m serious, Ash signed, their mouth stuffed with bread. Let’s get married. Or at least run away together. I’ll live on bread and jam and be chubby and happy.

Zhong laughed. You can’t live on bread. Please tell me that you usually eat better.

No. Ash sighed. Nurses lecture people all day on eating healthy, but then they end up scarfing candy bars in the hallway and getting McDonald’s on the way home because they’re too tired to deal with it. And the alcohol and narcotics usage is higher than the rest of the population. I think smoking rates are supposed to be down, not that you could tell from the nurses that I work with.

Zhong started slicing peppers, amused when Ash darted in to grab a few. He was tempted to scold them, the way he’d always been scolded as a child, but since they were just going to eat it anyway he didn’t see how it mattered.

Do you use any of those things? Zhong asked. Alcohol and so on?

No... I have other ways to relax.

Like what?

Ash looked like they were going to say something else but stopped themself. It took Zhong a moment, but he realized it was probably something kinky. He didn’t mind hearing about it, but it made sense that Ash didn’t want to share.

He watched them reformulate their response. Sewing mostly. Any art really.

Ash stole a few more pepper slices, but just set them on the counter.

Zhong moved on to slicing zucchini. You’re very talented, he finally observed. Why aren’t you a professional artist?

Ash grimaced. I started a masters degree in design, actually. But the fashion world is a bunch of superficial backstabbers, and it wasn’t for me. I did the gallery circuit with some paintings and sculptures for a couple years. But after hustling for sales, I realized that I was starting to hate it. I mean, I love art, but I’m happier making it and enjoying it when there’s no money involved and it’s not my full-time job.

Zhong almost stopped chopping just to watch Ash, who didn’t seem to notice that they were usually signing with a vegetable in one hand or the other. While they spoke, they picked them up, moved them around, occasionally ate one, and set them down.

He moved on to cutting the broccoli and set a few pieces next to them, if only to see what they would do next. That makes sense. What made you choose nursing?

That brought a grin to Ash’s face. My mom, actually. We went to nursing school together. She’s really smart, but she dropped out of high school when she had me. She used to clean people’s houses when I was a kid, but nursing was always her dream. I said I’d take a class with her just to get her started, but I kind of fell in love with it, too.

That’s really sweet. Your mom sounds like an amazing person.

She is, Ash agreed. I think she’d like you.

My mother is scary, so I’ll keep you away from her.

Ash laughed, then plucked a few more vegetables from the growing piles. Zhong let the conversation lag while he got out the chicken and a new cutting board.

When he returned, Ash was arranging the veggies in a fanciful design. A pool of red peppers was framed by a swirl of carrot slices that exploded into a constellation of broccoli florets and pea shoots. Zhong cut up the chicken, trying not to disturb Ash as they integrated the zucchini into the design.

That’s beautiful, he finally commented.

Ash looked down, then looked back up in surprise. Sorry. I didn’t realize I was doing it. They swept it all into a pile.

No, go ahead. It was fascinating watching it form, and even more interesting that Ash had apparently done it subconsciously. Can you make another one?

Ash looked pleased. Zhong tossed the chicken into the wok, then remembered the scallions. He cut off the white tips to sauté and gave the first handful of green rings directly to Ash for their masterpiece.

This one seemed almost like a quilt, with interwoven squares of color. It didn’t quite follow a pattern, but was close enough that the variations popped out. It reminded him a bit of a coral reef.