Page 81 of Love Lessons: Expanded Edition

Chapter 15

Landon

Landon didn’t know how long he stood in the parking lot. He moved out of the parking spaces to lean on a cement pillar and that was as far as he could manage.

He watched cars come and go. Some of them held people from the munch. Some were strangers. No one seemed to notice him, and that was fine with him.

He’d gone from devastated to just… nothing. Numb.

He saw a swirl of color in his peripheral vision, but he didn’t turn toward it or away. Even when it resolved into Ash in green tights, a brown sort of toga dress, and a scarf that looked like it was made of individual leaves. Like some sort of Robin Hood or forest sprite.

Ash pressed in closer. Do you want to talk about it?

Landon shrugged. He had no idea. Even deciding to talk about it seemed like too much of a decision for his shuttered mind.

Ash pulled him into a hug. At first it was awkward. They didn’t know each other that well, except for seeing each other once a month at munches where they were usually the only people who signed.

Ash was shorter than Landon and their leaf-scarf thing was scratchy. But their thin arms were strong, and when Landon started to move away, after that socially-acceptable-amount-of-time-for-a-hug, they just squeezed tighter.

Tighter and tighter, offering safety and peace. Long after anyone else would have let him go. There it was again, that cuddling thing. Why the fuck could everyone else do it and not Landon?

And that was when he broke, sobbing wildly into their arms. Ash just held him, stroking up and down his back with their gentle artist’s hands.

He didn’t know how long they stood like that, on the edge of the parking lot to the sound of cars whooshing by behind him.

Finally, he seemed to be out of tears, though his devastation was bottomless. Ash grabbed his hand and started pulling him somewhere. He followed, lacking any initiative of his own. Oh, back into the diner. That made sense.

Ash pulled them into a booth and ordered something, but Landon wasn’t paying attention until they started pouring something from two mugs into a third.

It’s like a mocha. They thrust it toward Landon.

He watched Ash combine the other two half-cups into a mug and finally figured it out. Hot chocolate and coffee. Like a mocha. It wasn’t until he was cradling the mug in his hands that he realized how cold his fingers had gotten outside.

He took a sip. He disliked sweets and the coffee was kind of terrible here, but the way that Ash had made it for him warmed him inside. He decided to smell it instead.

What happened?

God. He didn’t even know where to start. I’m having subdrop today.

Ash's eyes got wider than Landon realized was possible. Holy fuck, Landon. Drink your hot chocolate, they urged.

Landon quirked his head to the side.

It works. Like with dementors.

It took Landon a minute to figure it out. Oh, like in Harry Potter.

Yep, that’s totally what subdrop is like. You need chocolate. Want me to get you some cake or something?

Landon found a smile fighting through the fog of depression. Ash was really sweet for staying with him. No, thank you. I don’t like desserts that much.

Ash looked skeptical. Maybe some fries? That might be almost as good.

Maybe I’ll order some food the next time someone comes by.

Landon took a sip of his horrible “mocha.” He was still feeling wretched, but he was grateful for Ash’s calm presence. It was nice to feel like someone was there for him when everything seemed so irreparable.

Ash took another sip then set down their cup. Did Dustin know about the subdrop? I mean, I assume he’s the cause.