Page 39 of Ex Somnis

I pace and try to do something useful with the thing currently happening in my chest. Not fury exactly. It’s still there. It hasn’t gone anywhere, but underneath it is something that has been building since the moment he said, “I couldn’t let him do that to you,” and that something is the warmth of understanding that the worst thing Paul ever did to me was done because he was trying to protect me.

Wait, that means…

I stop pacing and turn back to look at him.

“Three months ago, when I stepped into your dreamscape.”

“I tried to keep you out, but he saw anyway.” Paul sighs and runs a hand over his head. “He told me that he’s had you pinned for the last few months. I’m sorry I couldn’t keep you safe.”

“All because of that promise? How is that even fair when I was the one breaking it?”

Paul stands and starts pacing. “I have no idea.”

“What is it with that guy and promises?” I mutter.

Both of us, pinned in our own nightmares, neither of us knowing the other was struggling in the same way by the same asshole.

A hundred nights for me, five years for him, and…

“The Shaw boy,” I murmur.

“What about him?” Paul frowns, adjusting his glasses.

“I visited his dreamscape because of… reasons. And I found This Man there. He’d been there a while. It looked like it amused him, torturing Nevan.”

Paul freezes, then lets out a long breath. “That’s why he mentioned Nevan. He—” Paul stops, shaking his head. “It doesn’t matter right now. I don’t know what Nevan has to do with any of this, other than…”

“Lennon,” we both say at the same time.

Paul exhales while I put the lollipop back between my teeth.

Right. More pressing issues.

We’ll finish dismantling five years of mutual disaster later.

“Right now, she needs us both,” I say after another breath. “So we get her back first, and then we can go back to arguing about who she belongs to.”

Paul studies me for a moment. “That seems inefficient.”

“You’ll survive.”

He sighs again. “Agreed.”

“So, what’s the plan?”

“There is no plan. Plans require information. Right now, we have the fact that she’s still asleep, and you can’t dream share with her, or you wouldn’t be here.”

“Correct.”

“You said she’s your tether.” He doesn’t look at me when he says it. “Are you hers?”

I shift in the chair, the lollipop pressing hard into my cheek. “I don’t know.”

“I see.”

“Don’t.” I pull the lollipop out and point it at him again.

“I’m not doing anything.”