Page 41 of The Sole Love

“Yes, it was probably as you said. I was a little furious that I could admire a woman who so completely ignored the rules of polished society.”

She could not look at him. “I understand.”

“No, you do not! Look at me, Elizabeth.” It was both an order and a plea.

She blushed at the sound of her Christian name, which to him had become the most cherished name in the world.

She fixed her eyes on his, saying, “Yes, Fitzwilliam,” making him forget his words as he became lost in her gaze.

“You do not understand. That Netherfield was a long time ago. Let us not apologise or remain any longer in the past.”

“I agree.” It was what she wanted too, although from time to time, when she reflected on the past, she still had unanswered questions.

“But now I can recognise that behind my confusion and slight anger was admiration for that Miss Elizabeth that I could not deny.”

“Oh! So you wanted to deny it!” she said, but this time she was smiling.

“Stop, do not go further—”

He wanted to say more, but from the back of the house, Mary’s voice came to invite them to dinner and tell them that the Gardiners had arrived. As Elizabeth stood, he took her hand again. Before he could rise, he was struck by her appearance against the colours of the sunset. She seemed not a worldly being, but a fairy descended from a long-ago tale, weaving the threads of his life into a strange yet fascinating canvas.

“They are expecting us for dinner,” she murmured.

“Let them,” he said hoarsely as he rose to stand so close to her that she wanted to escape, but his arms grasped her firmly. They embraced for a few seconds before he released her.

Elizabeth stopped in the hall to check her gown and face, worried that the incredible experience had marked her forever. Yet when she entered the dining room, nobody seemed to notice her or Mr Darcy. As if by common agreement, the family continued to speak and laugh, ignoring the two as they sat at the table. Only during dinner did everybody discreetly look at each of them to see whether the proposal for which they were all waiting might finally be made.

Elizabeth could hardly eat, as she was in the midst of tremendous but happy turmoil. Mrs Gardiner could see that, but it was impossible to tell more. Mr Darcy spoke little, but his was not generally an affable nature, so his silence surprised no one. The two not-so-secret lovers could not take their eyes off one another. Sitting across from each other, they were involved in a continuous game of trying to remain present at the dinner table while being lost in each other at the same time. There was a delicious aspect to that meal, apart from the food, that made it far from dull or ordinary.

Mrs Gardiner watched with interest the change in her sister-in-law. She contributed little to the conversation, merely answering questions, and when she spoke, she avoided looking towards her husband. Nicely dressed, restrained, and with a gentility she had not shown in a long time, Mrs Bennet was now a respectable mother-in-law for any gentleman, including Mr Darcy. And in the candlelight, she looked as lovely as her daughters. Surely Mr Bennet had married her for the same beauty she had bestowed upon all their children. As for the rest, Mrs Gardiner refrained from making any harsh judgements, but she still could not sympathise with her situation.

As they prepared to leave, Mrs Gardiner took care to guide the discussion about the carriages and the travellers. She managed the situation so discreetly that it was decided that she and Elizabeth would travel with the Darcys; Mr Gardiner and Mr Bennet would ride together in the smallest carriage, while the girls and Mrs Bennet would have a larger carriage to themselves.

In the end, everybody was happy with the arrangement, and no one remembered that Mrs Gardiner had proposed it.

Chapter 18

The next morning at seven o’clock, three carriages awaited the travellers at Longbourn’s main gate. If the departure from Netherfield took place without incident, at Longbourn, between servants carrying luggage, Mrs Bennet giving orders, and five young women remembering every minute something important they had forgotten, there was complete chaos.

Mr Bennet climbed into the carriage with his brother Gardiner to avoid the tumult, and before long, their carriage departed. They did not wait for the others, as the first stop for the night had already been decided upon: Willen. Their tiresome day would be amply rewarded by comfortable beds and an excellent dinner at the home of one of Mrs Gardiner’s cousins, who had a large property near the village.

In the third carriage, Mr Darcy awaited Elizabeth. Impatiently, he jumped out and looked towards the house. She caught sight of him from her bedroom as he paced beside the carriage, glancing from time to time at the house, unaware that she could see his agitation. After one last look in the mirror, Elizabeth ran down the stairs and all the way to the gate, as she had done since she was a little girl.

He greeted her with a smile, curious whether she was grumpy in the morning or awoke with a pleasant face. As he helped her into the carriage, away from prying eyes, he kissed her hand. It was already a ritual they both adored. Miss Darcy and Mrs Gardiner welcomed her with sleepy faces, and in no time, the two ladies were asleep again.

But the couple across from them were awake, belying the fact that neither of them had slept for long. Their excitement had been so intense that they had found it difficult to fall asleep, and in the morning, they had been the first to wake, impatient to depart.

To Darcy’s surprise, Elizabeth asked him the same question that had crossed his mind moments before.

“Are you grumpy in the morning?” she whispered, looking at him.

He wanted to say, You will see for yourself, but he only smiled, which expressed much the same thing. Infallibly, she understood and blushed. Their relationship had grown so deep that, lately, in certain situations, no words were needed.

She is embarrassed by any reference to an intimate life, he thought with much satisfaction, looking at her. It would be such a bliss to help her discover love.

And again, she almost guessed his thoughts. It was those matters that she still feared…but desired more and more with each moment they spent together.

And they were together in the carriage. Obviously, Mrs Gardiner had decided to make their journey unforgettable. He could stretch out his arm and reach Elizabeth; he could take her into his arms in an instant and never let her go.