Page 82 of The Beta Test

Me: Jake who? I know lots of Jakes.

Unknown number: Wow.

Unknown number: I must have the wrong number. I thought I was talking to Avery James, but I guess not. Is this Dan?

Me: Ouch. Ok, fine. This is Avery.

Me: What can I do for you, Jake?

Unknown number: First of all, save my phone number in your phone. And also, we’re doing calculus together tomorrow.

Me: I’ll think about the first request. As for the second - fine. As long as you bring snacks this time.

Unknown number: I have a policy to only provide snacks for people who save my contact info.

Me: *sends pic of Jake’s saved contact info*

Jake: *sends pic of snacks*

February

31415: Roses are red,

Violets are blue,

I’m thinking about Valentine’s plans,

How about you?

80085 [Me]: Does studying for a math test count?

31415: Depends. Does the studying include anyone else?

80085 [Me]: Actually… yes.

80085 [Me]: And there will likely be chocolate involved.

31415: Practically sounds like a date to me.

80085 [Me]: That might be a stretch.

80085 [Me]: What are your plans, Mr. Pi? Serenading a lady over a slice of pie…?

31415: For your sake, I’ll ignore that “joke,” but yes… there are plans. No pie.

31415: But maybe chocolate.

55378: Avery, this is Analiese.

80085 [Me]: For the last time, Analiese - I know!

55378: Sorry! Geeze. They should make the names editable in this stupid app.

80085 [Me]: Maybe they will after the beta test?

55378: They should kill the whole idea imo. Anyway, you know how we have to watch Pride and Prejudice…?

55378: I was wondering if you wanted to watch it together. You know, to brainstorm for the essay.