Page 41 of The Beta Test

Jake’s eyebrows lift a fraction. “Hunter’s a cool kid. I like hanging out with him.”

I nod. “Yeah, he’s great. But speaking of Halloween, don’t you think the ‘fun size’ candy is kind of a misnomer? What’s fun about the smallest possible piece of candy? They should be called ‘sample size’ or ‘depression size’ or something. Don’t you think?”

“I guess? But can we get back to the⁠—”

But I barrel forward with a little laugh, feeling a gust of energy. Yes, we can dust aside my teeny, tiny little breakdown and move on to lighter topics. Why was I stressed? It seems so silly now. I’m sure Jake just wanted to blow off school and have some fun. It’s fine.

“My dad always said taking some of our candy as a ‘tax’ was a good way to learn the harsh realities of economics as a kid, but he conveniently only taxed our favorite candies like Reese’s or M&Ms.”

My mind’s eye conjures a vision of my dad laughing while he eats our treats, and tears spring unbidden to my eyes. Why did I bring up my dad? I blink quickly and force the tears back.

Jake takes a bite of his food and nods. I don’t like the concerned gleam in his eyes, but I ignore it. Maybe he regrets getting chicken instead of barbacoa. Not my problem.

I pivot topics again as I pick up my fork and smush my guac around. “Oh! You know I talked to someone on Connection Services who said classic milk chocolate M&Ms aren’t the best flavor, can you believe that? So insane. Right?”

The pause lingers. I look at him expectantly.

Jake leans back slightly. “Oh. Do I get to talk now?”

He continues. “Setting aside that I know you’re deflecting your problems—again—I’d say your connection sounds rather intriguing. Life is too vibrant and varied to limit yourself to plain M&Ms. Why not try peanut butter and jelly or lose yourself in the delights of popped caramel?”

A sense of familiarity nudges me, and I can’t help following it—just to see what happens. “Why would I want to risk disappointment?”

Jake smiles winningly. “I bet you used that line on your connection, didn’t you? What did he say?”

“I didn’t say it was a guy.”

“Well, is he?”

“I think? We don’t discuss those kinds of things. It’s supposed to be anonymous, Jake.”

“Of course.” He nods understandingly. “So what do you talk about?”

I shrug. “School, movies, stuff like that.” I take a sip of water. “Food a lot, it seems.”

Jake finishes the last bite of his burrito bowl and wipes his chin with a napkin. “That’s a surefire topic to win over Avery James. The guy has game.”

I laugh and push my bowl towards him, knowing he’ll finish the rest of mine. He takes it without question. “It’s not like that.”

He squints at me. “I think you like him. It’s ok, I won’t tell anyone.”

“For the hundredth time, Jake, I’m with Braden.”

He tucks into my bowl. “Right, but what if the artificial intelligence behind the app is on to something? This guy could be your true soulmate. Scientifically speaking, I mean.”

All my problems with Braden float to the surface, and I feel my hands shake slightly. I’m sure Jake means well and wants to joke around, but I… can’t. Time to wrap up this little impromptu lunch.

I tap my phone screen to check the time. “Look, if you asked me to ditch just to subject me to some sort of relationship Spanish Inquisition, I’m out. There’s still time for you to drop me off at school before fifth period if we leave now.”

“NO!” Jake blurts, taking me by surprise. “No,” he repeats again, more softly. “Let’s go do something else then.”

“Jake, I don’t know⁠—“

“It’ll be fun. Sometimes we need a break from everything. I actually read an article saying productivity improves when people take breaks from the day-to-day. That’s what you’re worried about, right? Messing up your schedule or having to make up schoolwork?”

Um, yeah. That and his determination to question me on things I don’t want to discuss. No thanks.

He sees my hesitation and immediately knows the source. It’s getting freaky how well Jake appears to know me.