Page 403 of Power Play

“I always knew he was there.”

“No, you didn’t.” I tapped two fingers against my temple. “This motherfucker lives inside me all the time. El Cuchillo isn’t something people yell when I score. It’s the part of me that knows how to survive after everybody else has taken what they came for. The reason I will never let another motherfucker carry away a piece of my soul.”

“I didn’t take it.”

“I gave it to you!”

My shout crashed through the room. I threw both hands into the air because I couldn’t hold the rage inside my body anymore.

“You had it, Charm. Every ugly fucking piece I protected from everyone who ever tried to own me, place me, use me, or leave me. I gave it to you because I believed you were the one person who would never make me feel disposable.”

“I have never believed you were disposable.”

“I don’t care what you believed. I care what you did.”

“You think I don’t?”

“I think you believe hating yourself for it should count as fixing it.”

“That isn’t fair.”

“Nothing about this is fair.”

“I know I need help.”

“For yourself or because you want me back?”

“For both.”

“Wrong fucking answer.”

“Then what do you want from me?”

“Nothing!”

“You’re screaming because you want nothing?”

“I’m screaming because I want everything, and I know better than to take it!”

Her eyes widened. I closed the final space between us until every breath pushed my chest against hers.

“You gutted me, and you think I’ll forget because you finally learned how to fight after I stopped being yours.” My voice tore apart beneath the force of everything coming through it. “You think I’ll hand you my soul again because you showed up in my jersey and watched me from a place I couldn’t see you.”

“I never asked for your soul.”

“You didn’t have to. It was already yours.”

“Then stop pretending you took it back.”

The words landed directly inside the wound. I stared at her while my breathing became too loud in the space between us.

“Llévate mi puta alma para que nunca puedas volver a lastimarme.”

Her mouth trembled. “What does that mean?”

“Take my fucking soul so you can never hurt me again.”

“Ryan—”