Page 6 of Bless My Heart

And, I’m working on becoming an established professor at Brunswick University. I’m about to start my second year of teaching in the School of Business. I opted to not teach a course over the summer, so I’m starting fresh for the fall semester.

The night out three weeks ago was a nice way to end summer break, but now with the semester about to start, I’m spending more and more time in my office at the University. I’ve got my syllabus for each class posted on the student portal along with the first assignment. I’m teaching most of the same classes I taught in the Spring, so I already had a lot of things prepared. Since I’m a new professor, I don’t get to teach the fun, specialized classes yet. I’m mostly stuck with the easy stuff. But that’s fine. I’ll work up to it.

On the first day of each semester, I try to dress extra professionally. Since I’m one of the youngest professors in our department, I get mistaken for a student a lot. Today, I chose black slacks, a white silk cami, and a brown and black checkered blazer. Even though I really don’t want to, I wear heels and throw some flip-flops in my bag to change during my office hours. I also throw in a few Band-Aids because I will for sure get a blister from these shoes. I haven’t even worn them enough to break them in.

I decide to leave my hair straight because, let’s be honest, it’s going to end up in a bun by my last class, anyway. It’s also harder to see the purple in my hair when it’s straight. When my students see the purple, they immediately think I’m a cool professor, but they shouldn’t get too excited. I want Economics to be fun for my students, but I also want them to understand it and learn it. I love teaching and it’s fun for me when I see my students make connections.

I throw on some mascara and lipstick — I like to keep it simple —and I grab my bag before running out the door. My first class isn’t until ten this morning, but I like to be in my office by eight to get ready for the day.

It feels surreal very time I drive up to Brunswick U. I got my Bachelor’s degree here nine years ago. I had some great times here when I was an undergrad and met Lexi and Caroline. They stayed local to Brunswick while I went off and got my Masters and Ph.D. from Georgia State University in Atlanta.

When I saw that a position opened up in the School of Business at Brunswick, I jumped at the opportunity. It felt like coming home. Some professors I had as an undergrad are still teaching here, and they put in a good word for me with the interview committee. Honestly, it’s kind of weird being peers with the people I used to look up to, but it’s cool. I just have to try extra hard not to be awkward.

Last year was a learning experience, but I am definitely ready to hit the ground running this year.

I get to my tiny office on the third floor of the business building. My diplomas are hanging on the wall next to the bright orange poster that says “E-cow-nomics.” When I accepted this position, my friends got me the poster as a joke. It shows all the economic systems explained with cows. It’s a bit basic but usually makes the students laugh when they stop in during office hours.

I get my laptop set up and start going through emails from the weekend. A few students have already emailed me with excuses for why they’ll miss the first day of class. I reply to them with a copy of the syllabus, telling them to review the attendance policy. I don’t have time for students who don’t take school seriously. If they don’t make an effort, they won’t make it through my classes. I accept a few meeting invites that came in, including the new staff meeting for this semester. Who schedules meetings on Friday mornings? Ugh.

Then, I grab my favorite “Economics is Lit” coffee mug and head to the staff lounge to fill up on coffee before my first class. Thankfully, someone brought donuts. I’m reaching into the box when Dr. Ellis strolls up behind me.

“Good morning, Dr. Greenwood. Nice to see you,” she says, and I know she’s lying. She the only professors here who doesn’t like me. My mentor, Dr. Sam Englewood, told me she was the one person on the interview committee who voted not to hire me. I don’t know why she has her panties in a bunch when it comes to me, but I try my best to ignore her. Sam tells me it’s because she sees me as competition, but I don’t know.

“Good morning, Dr. Ellis.” She flashes me a tight smile, barely showing her blindingly white teeth. I want to tell her to calm down on the teeth whitening treatments because her teeth will start glowing in the dark here pretty soon.

She takes a bite of her apple. “Starting the year off with a healthy breakfast, I see.” She eyes the chocolate-frosted, glazed donut currently held in my hand. ”Your boyfriend couldn’t make you a nice breakfast for your first day of school?” She says boyfriend like she can’t believe I could actually have one.

“Oh, well, we broke up actually, so donuts it is,” I say, trying to sound cheerful.

“Aw, you poor thing. I guess you’re in the stress-eating portion of the break-up. That’s ok. I’m sure you’ll get all the extra weight off quickly when you’re ready.” This woman is so fake. I don’t see how she has any friends at all.

“Yep,” I say with a mouth full of donut. God forbid a woman puts on a little weight. Wouldn’t want to, you know, have curves or something crazy.

“Well, have a great semester.” She flips her blonde hair over her shoulder as she turns.

“You too,” I tell her as she walks away. I take a deep breath before heading back to my office. I don’t want to be in the staff room if Dr. Ellis comes back in and throws a few more insults my way. I think I’ve had my fill for the day.

I finish up my donut on the walk back to my office. I’ve got fifteen minutes until class starts, so I grab my bag and my laptop and head to the lecture hall.

Only a handful of students are in the lecture hall already; most of them are scrolling through their phones. I put my laptop on the podium and get the projector set up with my day one PowerPoint.

As the class fills up, I get a little nervous. I instantly wish I had put my hair up. I can already feel it sticking to the back of my neck a bit.

I always get nervous at the beginning of class because I hate public speaking. Once I get into the lesson, though, I’m usually fine. I get passionate about so many topics I teach. Sometimes I forget I’m in a room full of twenty-somethings who probably don’t care what I’m talking about and just go. I could talk for hours, so I set a timer on my phone to I know when to stop.

I try not to look at the students as they come in. I don’t want it to be awkward. I mean, I’m probably the awkward one. Do I smile? Do I wave? Do I welcome them to class? I don’t know. So, I just don’t make eye contact until I see the time on my phone change to exactly ten a.m.

I look up from the podium. The lecture hall is mostly full, which is surprising for an earlier class on a Monday morning.

I look over the crowd of faces to see if I recognize any from last semester. I didn’t check through the names on the roster, but I’m better with faces than I am names anyway.

“Good morning everyone. I’m Dr. Hazel Greenwood. Welcome to Microeconomics …” I trail off when my eyes land on a set of vivid green eyes sitting in the middle of the lecture hall.

I know those eyes.

Those eyes rocked me to my very core against a dirty bathroom wall.

This cannot be happening. There is no way. Maybe Wes from the bar has a twin brother or a really good doppelgänger. Yeah, that must be it.