Page 4 of I Still Love You (Citation Needed)

Lizbeth continued to talk as she walked next to me. “I met them last year because of Ginny. Carrie’s very energetic about improving the city, but you should know there’s a bit of a war happening within city leadership.”

I raised an eyebrow, interested in learning more. I made a mental note to discreetly ask around about this. Lizbeth didn’t often share the details of her personal life, but I was curious about the changes in the city. If Lizbeth was ready to share, then I wasn’t going to stop her.

“Most of the accessibility improvements in the city are because of the work the university president and Carrie have done together. Carrie agreed to host this event because President Fairfax asked,” Lizbeth continued.

I took a deep breath and slowly exhaled. I had a lot of big feelings about Lois Fairfax and few of them were good. She had fought me tooth and nail to avoid making accessibility improvements for years when she was a faculty member. To hear that she was now instrumental in all the changes was frustrating but not a surprise. The night Mason and I had broken up, it was because I found out that she was stealing my work about making the campus more accessible and not crediting me. At the time, I had been angry, but now I could see how the city benefited from it. I couldn’t help but wonder if she had done all of this to spite me. I always knew Lois was ambitious and wanted more for the university. Maybe the city would benefit from that ambition.

We turned a corner and saw Mason standing with his back to us, talking to a woman with black hair pulled into a bun. She was wearing jeans and a sweater. She waved to Lizbeth when she saw us. This had to be Carrie Woodhouse. Mason slowly turned around, his hand raised to wave until he saw me. His smile faded and his shoulders raised half an inch.

“I am so excited about this weekend. I really think this can improve all those minimal entries related to fiber work,” Carrie said as we got closer. “You must be Penny Smith! I know your friend Emma Shaw!”

I did my best to smile, but my eyes were locked on Mason’s. We had ignored each other at dinner last night. I resisted the desire to come up next to him and pull him down so I could wrap my arms around him. Now in his mid-thirties, he looked better than he had in graduate school. His shoulders seemed broader and his neck longer. He also looked exhausted, with dark circles under puffy eyes. His thick black hair had been cut short and no longer fell in his eyes. I also wanted to rewind him to the version of the man I had loved so powerfully.

“Penny,” he said slowly. “Congratulations on the new job.”

I didn’t know how to respond and didn’t trust my voice to not crack. “Thank you,” I finally said after clearing my throat. “I understand you’re up for tenure this year.”

Mason’s fake smile fell, and it was clear that tenure wasn’t a topic that excited him.

“Is there a place Penny can set up?” Lizbeth said, not letting silence make this more uncomfortable. “Some of the foundation staff asked to come by before the day got started to chat with her.”

I let Lizbeth and Carrie discuss my options while I focused on Mason. Now that I could see him closely, I could tell that the man before was a shadow of the one I had loved so deeply. The bags under his eyes made him look exhausted. He had always smiled when we were together, and now his flat expression accentuated his exhaustion. He was dressed in worn out jeans and a dull sweater he had worn often when we were together. The Mason I remembered always looked put together, even when dressed casually. He had favored dark wash jeans and trendy t-shirts. When he was teaching, the t-shirts might change to white button-down shirts and snug sweaters. I always loved how his clothes accentuated his strong shoulders and arms. This wasn’t a sign that his taste had changed, but that he had worn these clothes into the ground.

I broke my gaze away from Mason and turned to meet Carrie’s eyes when she said my name. The younger woman was taking in everything that was happening with interest.

“Do you need privacy?” Carrie asked.

I nodded as I looked around at my options. “At least sound privacy.”

Carrie followed my gaze and began to nod. “We can move the walls around to create smaller spaces, but I think the back room is the most private. It’s a little nook that can fit a handful of people,” she said and led me to a small workroom with a table and four chairs. “We’ve made sure wheelchairs can access all our rooms.”

I nodded and looked around. I was pleased to see that, if I wanted, I could wheel my chair around to the back of the space and not have to move the other chairs around. “This will be perfect,” I said and noted that while the door and wall of the entrance were glass, the rest of the room was drywall. This would do a lot to keep things private.

Carrie helped me move around the chairs. “Your friend Emma told me you were coming and to make sure you’re comfortable.”

I smiled at the mention of my best friend. “She mentioned your name, too, and to let you know if I need anything.”

Carrie’s excitement helped me relax. “I love working with her. She said you went to college together. Do you know Fredrick Wentworth too?”

I chuckled, often asked this question by people when my connection to Emma comes up. “The three of us went to Northwestern together. I was at their wedding and see them every year at Cape Cod.”

“I just love her. You need to come by the yarn store before you leave,” Carrie said as she pulled the extra chair out of the room. “We have a cafe that’s great to work in. Lots of people hang out there. If you graduated around the same time as Mason then you missed us expanding by a couple of years.”

I was intrigued by a cafe in a yarn shop, especially if it was popular. I didn’t have time to ask, as Carrie left me alone to get comfortable. I made a mental note to stop by the shop before leaving town. I knew a number of people who would love to hear about it.

Chapter Four

Only three of the staff members came to chat with me that morning. When they left, each looked more relaxed than they had when they arrived. When I returned to the main space, I found people crowding the registration table to pick up their badges and schedules.

People walked by, congratulating me as they walked past. I was amused that everyone already knew something that hadn’t been announced yet. Sometimes I would go places and feel invisible, but other times I would feel like there was a spotlight on me. When I was at EncycloWiki events, it always felt like I belonged. It was the right balance of attention and being able to be alone if I needed it. I was no longer a mere participant here to enjoy myself and learn. I wasn’t sure what to do with myself with my meetings finished.

“Do you want to see the rest of the space?” Carrie asked when she noticed I seemed stuck without an idea of where to go next.

I brightened at the offer and she waved a hand to follow her. She seemed like one of those women who walked at a rapid pace, rushing to get to her next obligation. I appreciated that she slowed her pace so I didn’t struggle to keep up with her. She led me into a room filled with round white pods where people were setting up to work. Some people sat while others laid down, almost all with laptops. A screen was lowered on a few for privacy, and I wondered if those people were catching a nap.

“This is a museum and archive dedicated to the fiber industry. My family realized nothing like this existed in the country. We felt we had a responsibility as industry leaders to record our history,” Carrie said as we made our way through the space. “Plus, I thought it would be a small way to bring in some tourists now that we’re working to build up the city for increased tourism.”

I perked up, remembering some news about recent developments in Lacock. “I understand the Northanger family is building a small theme park out here,” I said, wondering if this was part of the changes happening.