Page 51 of Marrying the Silver Fox

I lean my face into the palm of his hand. I am beyond grateful for his kind words, even if I don’t entirely believe them.

I’ve lived in that guilt and grief for so long that it has almost come to feel comfortable, and the thought that maybe I did actually do enough—that there really was nothing else I could have done to keep my brother from succumbing to the drug that consumed him and my parents—that’s a peace I haven’t felt in a very, very long time.

“Thanks,” I murmur, and Nikolai caresses my cheek with his thumb before he draws his hand away, giving me a moment to pull myself together.

“But, yeah,” I continue, once I’ve managed to clear my head enough to speak again. “That’s why I didn’t want you to kill Max. No matter what he did. I knew that you would never be able to forgive yourself, if you shot him in a moment of rage like that. Even if you never see him again, at least you’ll know he’s out there. And at least you won’t have to live with the guilt of knowing that you took someone who was your own flesh and blood off this earth…”

He nods. “I think I get it now.”

“You do?”

He shrugs. “Enough that I think I made the right choice,” he replies. “Nearly.”

“Nearly?”

“He took my wife from me,” he reminds me. “Tried to take my child. It’s hard to think of him walking around with breath in his lungs.”

“You think he’s gone now?”

He nods again. “I had one of my men follow him out of the city,” he tells me. “To make sure he didn’t try and stick around any longer than he should have. He had commands to shoot to kill if Max tried to sneak off somewhere else and lick his wounds, but he was out of there like a bat out of hell. Must have known that he was lucky to get out alive. And that I might not be as merciful as you were if I found out that he had betrayed me.”

“Does your father know about it yet?”

“Unless Max has told him, no,” he replies.

“And how do you think he’s going to take it? You know, when you tell him?”

He sighs, pushing a hand through his silver hair. “I don’t know,” he admits. “I know this is going to hurt. No matter what, he loves both of us—I think he sees our mother in us, to be honest, and saying goodbye to any part of her is going to sting. But when he hears what Max did, he’ll see that I had no choice but to do what I did.”

“And what about…what about the baby?” I wonder aloud. “Have you told your father about that?”

A grin breaks over his face, and he shakes his head once more. “Not yet,” he replies. “But I know that’s going to make things a hell of a lot easier. Knowing that he has an heir. That’s what—” He stops himself in his tracks, and I cock my head at him.

“That’s what, what?”

He falls silent. I nudge him with my foot beneath the covers. “Come on, Nikolai,” I press him. “I told you what was on my mind. You have to tell me what’s on yours, right?”

That seems to make sense to him. I guess a businessman like him responds to a barter. He flicks a tongue over his lips, as though considering how best to put this into words before he comes out with it.

“That’s what he had been hoping for when I got married,” he explains. “A new generation, to take over the business. That’s what he told me. But if you ask me, I think he just wants to make sure that I have children of my own. He always told me that Max and I were the best things that ever happened to him, and I know he didn’t want me to miss out on the same thing. Hell, probably didn’t want to miss the chance to be a grandfather in his own right too…”

“A grandfather who’s a Bratva man,” I remark, shaking my head. “You think that’s going to be a problem?”

“Oh, I think he’s going to spoil our child in any way he can,” he chuckles. “I doubt they’ll want for anything. And make no mistake, when he finds out that we’re going to have a baby, he’ll put security on us like you wouldn’t believe. Half of the Russian immigrants in this city are going to be paid off to keep us safe, and he’ll rain down hell on anyone who dares cause us trouble.”

“Might help when we’re trying to get them into a decent kindergarten,” I joke, and he laughs.

“You’re kidding, but I wouldn’t put it past him,” he warns.

“So when are you going to tell him?”

“I haven’t decided yet. Once we’ve had a chance to confirm the pregnancy with a doctor, probably.”

“And when will that be?”

“You sound excited,” he remarks, grinning.

My cheeks flush slightly. “I am,” I admit. “I…I really, really am.”