Page 16 of Three Hockey Hotties

Much to my relief, the bus is actually pulling up as we reach the sign indicating the bus stop. I start jogging toward it, trying to outrun the rain even though I’m already soaked through my pink sweater.

“Thank you both so much!” I say. “I really appreciate it!”

I’m not even sure what I’m thanking them for. The very brief tour? The exposure to the fun of being on ice? Walking me to the bus stop?

Or a sexual awakening I didn’t know I needed?

Maybe all of the above.

I wave maniacally and jump on the first step the second the driver opens the doors.

“Abby, wait.” Kane takes a step toward me.

He’s going to get on the bus.

Dash grabs his arm. “Kane,” he says firmly. “No.”

Kane sighs but he says to me, “We’ll see you soon.”

It’s not a request.

It’s clearly a promise.

Goosebumps trail up my arms.

I nod, because I want to see them again too.

“You getting on?” the driver asks.

Kane shakes his head no.

The door snaps shut unceremoniously.

I fish my phone out and scan my bus pass. I almost topple over when the bus starts rolling down the street, but I grab the pole and hang on.

Kane and Dash are watching me.

Then they turn, and a minute later I see them get into an SUV that pulled up.

With a sigh of either relief or disappointment, I’m not sure, I sink down into the nearest seat and drag in a deep breath.

At times like this, I wish I could reach out to my sister, Emily. I don’t because if I did, she wouldn’t even respond.

We used to be close, before my cancer. Then all of our parents' attention was on me, and Emily felt neglected, which was true, honestly. She was left to her own devices for the first few years of high school. She resents me for it, and I don’t know how to fix that or explain that Mom and Dad were just trying to do the best they could in difficult circumstances.

That none of us wanted to go through any of that.

Just like Mom and Dad didn’t want to have to file medical bankruptcy either, something I still feel guilty about to this day.

But while I don’t have my sister in my life, I do have Sadie, my roommate at Children’s Hospital, and fellow ALL survivor. She’s been a sister to me in every sense of the word.

I swipe on my phone and text her.

Do you like hockey?

I like boys. Is that good enough?

Yes. Want to go to a Mutts game this weekend?