Page 60 of Trove’s Purpose

Chee was shaking by the window, and he realized probably entirely too late that she did not want to hear this. Before he could change the subject, however, Tanin asked-

“So, are you going to do it?”

“Huh?”

“Accept her offer, I mean. To let her keep you until we get the cup.”

“Ah… That’s not…”

Chee finally whipped around, and he didn't know if it was better or worse that her face was bright red but her eyes were dry.

“Don’t hesitate on my account,” She snapped, angry. “It’s a great deal for you. Instead of paying for sex, you get to be paid for it. Isn’t that fantastic?”

Before Trove had a chance to respond, she was shoving her way past them and out into the hall.

“She didn't like that,” he said dumbly.

“You think?” Tanin asked, raising a brow. “But you won’t claim her, so you don’t care, right?”

“That’s not true,” Trove frowned. “I don’t want to hurt Chee. And I don’t want to stay with Rinnicks.”

“Then, maybe you should have said that.”

Tanin’s calm statement made him flinch.

He couldn’t do this, he realized. He couldn’t keep living like this. He had to do something…

Chapter 20

Chee

A beautiful planet comparable to paradise, the type of place she’d only seen in artistic renditions of space and the sky. So lovely it couldn’t be real, but it was, and all five of her senses longed to bask in the wonder and majesty.

But she couldn’t enjoy any of it.

After sitting, angry and unsettled, in her room for a few pointless hours, she’d then left the inn and gone wandering around in the city. She wasn’t sure what she wanted, but she knew she couldn’t stay cooped up in there any longer. The anxious, restless, unhappy energy would shred her apart if she kept trying to contain it in that little room.

Though walking around wasn’t much better.

Why was everything and everyone so damn happy? It was disgusting and annoying. The couples smiling and dancing and laughing. The tinkling music floating through the air. The scent of delicious food. The happy chirps of the animals and insects.

She hated all of them for how carefree and joyful they were.

Then, she hated herself for having that thought. She was letting all this turn her into a bitter, nasty person and she was so disappointed in herself for that. Her parents would have told her to stop letting self-pity make her mean and to accept what was happening so she could move past it.

But damn, it was hard.

She’d managed to wander her way all the way down to the waterfront by the time the sun had set. And, of course, that was beautiful too. The golden sand, under the light of a golden moon, had an ethereal glow that matched beautifully with the way the dark water lit up with each wave. She knew that the bright blue lights must be from algae or some kind of water creature or something, Earth had those too, but damn it was lovely in real life.

And she hated all of it.

Chee sat down on a rocky part of the beach, just a short way from a group of friends that were all laughing and playing around a fire they’d set up in the sand. They were cooking something sweet; she could smell it from here.

And she tried her very hardest not to resent those strangers as she picked up rocks and tossed them into the water. Each time she did, it disturbed those glowing creatures, and they lit up brightly around where the rocks hit the surface and sank down.

The bright city at her back, the twinkling stars overhead, the laughter and music floating distantly in the air. It was incredible. Her parents would love it here. She wished they were here. They’d tell her to stop being pitiful and force her up to play in the surf or give her some food and tell her there was no emotion carbs couldn’t improve.

She missed them so much. She missed home. She missed back when things were simple and she didn't have any of this to deal with and the idea of her soulmate was a wonderful dream that she could imagine and fantasize over.