Page 162 of Trove’s Purpose

The most obvious was that, clearly, she did not appreciate the windowless space. There was nothing they could do about that. He had volunteered to have an internal room so that the others could have windows. He didn’t really want one, so it wasn’t a sacrifice for him.

But his female was different. And she had marked on the wall beside the door and along the opposite wall where she wanted artificial windows. They were false windows that were very popular on starships that essentially simulated windows. They could show exterior views of the ship for full realism, but they could also be programmed to show specific world views, or planetary views, or whatever weather the occupant desired.

They were going to buy and install those windows when they reached Holotulle. But until then, she had marked out where she wanted them to go, and she had the brightness of the lights turned up. Not as bright as the rest of the ship, but enough that the entire room seemed softer, fuller.

And busier, as her belongings were everywhere. She had her luggage in one corner because she had yet to finish reorganizing his drawers. He’d offered to do it for her, but she insisted on being the one to separate them out and putting everything where she wanted it.

He was also happy to let her do that. It was a pleasure to just watch her move about their room, setting it to right. Fixing it the way she wanted. She was making his den into a comfortable nest, and it was a privilege for him to witness.

The picture of herself and her family was on the desk. She said she would get another frame in Holotulle that she would fill with pictures of the two of them, and her family as well as their crew and whatever friends they’d make. She wanted pictures of all of them, she said. She wanted proof of all of them being free, being happy, being together.

She had been in the middle of adding pillows and blankets to his bed when Garnet had gone into labor, so the task was only half done. Still, she looked relieved to fall back into the softness.

Chee smiled up at him before opening her arms. It was an invitation he couldn't resist.

Falling into his mate's embrace was a feeling unlike any other. Trove couldn't quite describe it. He didn't have anything to compare it to. It was freeing and exciting like the first time he left Rik-Vane. But it was also soothing and warm, like sinking into a pool of heated water. It warmed in his belly like a shot of high end liquor but stayed there, heavy and filling, like a hot meal.

He felt like he finally found something he had always unknowingly been longing for. Something he couldn’t imagine existed before knowing it personally.

It was the easiest thing in the cosmos.

Yet still more complicated than he could define.

He rested his head on her chest, arms around her. Her arms around him. She hummed contentedly as she ran her fingers up and down his back.

And that also was different. When she touched him, it was unlike anyone else. There was desire for him there, yes, but it was tempered and improved by her tenderness. Her joy. The pleasure she sought to give him, not just to take, as she ran her dull claws up and down his back.

“It was really beautiful,” she said suddenly.

“What was?”

“The birth. I mean, it was gross. Really gross. And yeah, the pain part was off entirely, so she just felt the baby moving down. Which – ew. Not sure how I feel about that. I don’t know why that seems weirder than not feeling it because of the pain. It took forever. There was a lot of… let's call them fluids, because I just got my stomach to settle. Nasty. Super nasty.

“And yet… When the baby was born, I cried. Not a lot. But I teared up. When the baby started crying, Garnet was crying, and then we were all crying. It was this big moment. Like… I don't know how to describe it. But we were connected. All of us. To each other. To our mothers. And their mothers. An unbroken chain of life and we were part of it. We were joined in it. Like all our mothers before us. It was… I don’t know. Do you get it? Am I making sense at all?”

“I think I understand,” he said, not entirely sure that he did. But his species did revere their ancestors, so he could understand the feeling of attachment to those that came before. Even if he himself never felt that attachment, it was inherent in his culture.

“Beautiful and gross,” Chee laughed. “That’s what it was. And she’s a girl! She’s so cute. She’s like a perfect cross between Garnet and Tanin.”

“Do you want one?”

“Hm?”

Trove lifted his head, looking down at her with a serious expression.

“Do you want a youngling of your own now?”

Chee smiled, running her fingers through his hair. She took the time to pull it free of its tail so she could stroke the long locks freely.

“Yes,” she finally said. Then put a finger to his mouth, stopping him when he moved to cover her. To fulfill that request immediately. It wasn’t possible right now, since her ovulation was off, but he was more than happy to challenge that certainty.

But that finger was all it took to bring him up short. Like she controlled him that easily.

“But not right now,” she said, smiling. “I want a family with you. Definitely. I want to give them all the love I was given first. I want to give my parents all the grandchildren for all the kids they never got to have because of what happened. But not yet.”

“You want to wait?”

She nodded eagerly.