Page 16 of Tame Me

“My ex-girlfriend,” he says.

“Ex?” Thane asks, looking at Reid.

“Ex,” Reid repeats. “The bitch… She’s just causing problems at my house.”

“Would you like to try some deep breathing exercises?” I ask, and Thane nearly chokes on his food.

“You’re a brat today, Ayla,” Reid says, trying to keep his sour mood intact.

“You’re sad today, Reid,” I quip. “How about you treat me like a normal person for a moment and tell me if you’re okay or not?”

“I’m not okay… but things will get better from here on out,” Reid says honestly.

“Join us today,” Thane says. “I’m going to show her around, and then we will go to the training room.”

“Okay,” Reid says, clearly disconnecting from his earlier sad demeanor. He takes a big bite of his food and smiles at me like I wasn’t just worried about him. Thane is looking at him just as worriedly, but in a more knowing way than I am.

“How long have you two known each other?” I ask.

“When was the first time you cut yourself?” Reid asks, making me frown. “If you want to ask questions, I think it’s only fair we get to also.”

“The night my father raped me for the first time,” I answer.

“Our whole lives,” Thane answers. “We were neighbors with the other psychiatrist, Tabitha.”

We go silent and finish our food. When I am done, I stand to take my plate. “Want me to take yours?” I ask Thane.

“You don’t have to,” he says. I roll my eyes and grab it anyway, since I wasn’t really asking. I stack them before grabbing Reid’s and walking to the kitchen. It takes me a moment to locate where I am supposed to set everything down. Once I do, I walk back to the table where Thane and Reid are waiting.

“What?” I ask Thane when he narrows his eyes at me. When he walks closer to me, he wraps his hand around my throat and pulls me closer before tipping my chin up to look down at me.

“You are my submissive, not my slave,” he says with a low and grave tone.

“Wanting to do nice things for you doesn’t make me a slave,” I say, knocking his hand away from me. He goes to grab me again, but I back up. “Maybe I just like being helpful, and you two are too stuck on my trauma to treat me like a real person.”

“Ayla,” he says.

“Can you just show me around already, Sir?” I ask simply with a deadpan expression.

“Come on,” he says, watching me closely.

I walk with him to the elevator, and he begins telling me about the building. We start with the second level, and we walk down the hallway to show all of the offices before we enter the conference room.

We get back into the elevator and go to the third floor. This is where all of the private training rooms are. Before going to my assigned room, we go up to the fourth floor. This is where all of the group activities happen, so I assume I will be here later today for group therapy.

The last place we go is up a set of stairs. At the top, there is a door that Thane uses his keys to unlock. When we walk up, I find that it’s the roof of the building.

They watch me as I walk out onto the roof and look around. I navigate myself to the edge, and they are rightfully on edge immediately. “Ayla,” Reid says hurriedly. He goes to reach for me when I step up onto the ledge, but stops when I bring myself down to sit on the edge.

I lean forward and look at my feet dangling over the edge of the four-story building. The concrete below calls to me, but it’s not loud enough for me to listen. I think some part of me will always want to die, but I have learned that I can want to die but still choose to live. Life fucking sucks for everyone, and that will never change, but it is what I make of it. I came here because I wanted to find who I am meant to be. I refuse to believe that I was only ever meant to die.

“What are you doing, Ayla?” Thane asks, sitting next to me.

“Just looking,” I say. “I’m sorry if it freaked you out.”

“It’s okay,” he says. “If you are compelled to explore, Ayla, make sure we know your plans. We don’t want to misunderstand.”

“What’s on your mind?” Reid asks from behind us.