Page 212 of Toxic Kiss

Tears trail down my cheek.

I’ve held so much guilt for so long, but now I realize no one is blameless in Patrick’s death, including Patrick for getting behind the wheel. I’ve tried to let that part of me go. But how do you release the dreams of our future? A future we’ll never know. I think I’ve clung to the guilt because holding it means I haven’t let Patrick go.

“I kept your secret…I always will. I just wish we had more time together,” I say as the wind picks up and my hair whips around my face. “Is that you? Are you here with me?”

Of course, there is no response, and yet, as crazy as it sounds, I can feel him standing beside me.

“You were right. It’s a good thing I didn’t take that bet. Cy finally admitted that he loves me, but I’m scared to let him in all the way. I’m terrified to trust him, Patrick,” I whisper. “I don’t know if I’m being a fool or if we were always destined to end up here.”

Bright orange and black colors catch my attention as a Monarch butterfly flutters closer. Holding out my hand, it lands on my finger, and its wings catch the light. I choke back a sob and lift my face to the warm sun.

“Thank you, Patrick.”

chapter

fifty-four

“Fame gave me everything I thought I wanted, and almost nothing I actually needed.” – Cyrus

CYRUS

The wait is agonizing. I have to do something, anything. The cottage feels homey and comfortable when I walk back inside. I can see Haven’s personal touches in every corner, adding to the serene atmosphere.

My phone has been off since we left the hospital. This is as good a time as any to check in with the rest of the world. I grab it from the counter where Haven left it and power it on. I can’t even remember the last time I went this long without my phone.

Regret slaps me in the face when it vibrates ferociously enough that any girl could drop it in her pants and get off.

“Fuck.”

Message after message. Missed calls by the dozens. Social media notifications in the thousands.

Text messages first, I guess. Vex’s name is at the top, so I take a seat and start there.

Vex: I know you two are away bonding or some fucking nonsense. But call me. Shit is going down.

Vex: Stop ignoring me, you prick.

Vex: Fuck you, fucker. Answer me.

I smirk at the dozen other messages from him calling me names, telling me I’m a dick, and threatening to kill me when he sees me. Very Vex.

Cyrus: Such a dirty mouth on you. You’re kinda turning me on.

Vex: Fucking finally.

Cyrus: Relax, my phone was dead and then off. I forgot to turn it on. What’s so important?

Vex: Have you seen the latest BS posts?

Cyrus: No.

Vex: Your mother is completely off the rails. I mean, she has always been off, but man…she’s fucking nuts.

Cyrus: Thanks.

Vex: I’m fucking serious. She called the cops on Haven. Anita is claiming that Haven abducted you. She is all over every app, crying that Haven is a psycho and a threat to you.

The anger is quick to rise.