Page 188 of Toxic Kiss

“Is that how you feel? Guilty for his death?”

“Yeah, I do. We were at a party and argued. We’d both been drinking, he stormed off and got in his car, then he was in a wreck. If we hadn’t argued, he’d still be here.”

“Do you see this friend often?”

I shake my head.

“No, this is only the second time. I’ve seen colors before, a rainbow, and once, a black void like the floor was missing.”

“Have you ever had command hallucinations?”

“Like harm myself or someone else?”

He nods his head.

“No. Never.”

This circular line of questioning gets us nowhere. I want nothing more than to rage and lash out, but Haven’s face flashes in my mind. I know exactly what she would tell me to do.

“How often do you have these hallucinations?”

“When I’m under a lot of stress, and sometimes right before my body starts to ache so much that I can hardly stand. It feels like a warning that the pain is coming. I usually end up not being able to get out of bed. Yesterday, was like that. I hurt everywhere.”

He doesn’t say anything, but his brows pull together, and I can see the little mice in his brain running on the treadmill. I don’t let myself hope that we are turning a corner.

“You mentioned intense stress. Do you find that stress affects your mood?”

“What you really want to know is if I’m depressed? Just ask what you really mean. I’m not some flower that will wilt because you were direct. I’m fine. Better than fine, actually. I’m happier than I’ve been in years. I’m not depressed. I’m excited for my future. I want to keep singing with my band. I want to marry Haven and start a real life outside of being a rockstar.”

I push away from the wall and take a step closer.

“Look, I am angry. But that’s because I’m confused about what is going on with my body. I want answers, not a short-term fix. Everything that I’ve been given has been just that, and I want to get to the source of the issue. That’s all.”

The next forty minutes go by with Dr. Chatty-fucking-Cathy probing into every aspect of my mind and life. By the time we are through, he knows everything about me, other than how many times a day I jerk off. I’m shocked he didn’t ask that.

Finally, he says the words that I want to hear. He holds out his tablet, and I sign off so I can get the fuck out.

The same guys that hauled me in here, bring in my belongings, and I can’t change out of these fucking scrubs fast enough. When they lead me past the locked doors, I can see the sunlight from the exit shining like heaven calling my name. I glance at my phone, and of course, it’s dead.

My heart soars as I step outside and spot Haven leaning against her car. Her arms are crossed, and her hair is wild and vibrant, matching her personality.

Her lips twitch up when she sees me, and before the crowd gathered can arrange a Bat-Signal to announce that I’m free, I jog down the few steps to meet her.

“You’re fucking beautiful,” I say, dropping my lips to hers for a quick kiss.

“Come on, get in the car,” Haven orders.

“Bossy, always so bossy,” I mumble, but secretly love it.

She gets in, starts the engine, and as we pull out, I turn to her.

“Are we going back to the hotel?”

“No.”

“Um…okay. Where are we going?”

“Can’t tell you.”