Page 53 of Ravaged By the Dark

He rubbed his hand up and down the back of his neck, his muscles flexed tight.

“Soon, we were asked to do jobs that no one else was stupid enough to attempt, but we jumped at the chance. We were cocky and wanted to prove ourselves. We wanted to make a name by being the best. That is how we ended up as SEALs. We were pointed in the direction by our command staff, and that was it. It was all the encouragement we needed to become one of the shining elites. We earned nicknames of death and wore them like badges of honor. I still use mine when I’m out in the field.”

“You don’t have to tell me all this, Arek.”

He sat beside her again and took her hand in his, the size comparison glaring as she stared at their hands. He was truly lethal. He could snap her neck if he wanted to, and yet she’d seen these same hands offer so much kindness. It was hard to comprehend the two different sides of him in one body.

“I want to tell you, at least what I can.” She nodded, and he sighed. “We were approached to take on a job that was never to be spoken of again—Trev was given the lead and the task to pick our group. Not everyone he chose was from the same unit, some weren’t even Navy, but we all had one thing in common—the ability to get a job done and get the hell back out.”

He started to play with her fingers as he continued to speak.

“There had been a convoy full of important people, and they were taken hostage. When that happened, the country they were in was not an ally country. Well, they were, but it wasn’t supposed to be known, or they would become a target.”

Arek rubbed at his eyes. “That should’ve been our first red flag—someone had already ratted them out, that was clear. It meant the rescue had to be an off-the-books mission. We had done a lot of covert missions, but this one was highly irregular. Normally we were given our target, and we went with our small unit, no questions asked, usually disposed of the target or retrieved important information and got the fuck back out. This job was a much larger risk and the way it was talked about meant it had to be extremely dangerous, and whoever we were saving was very important.”

Arek suddenly stood and began pacing again. He didn’t speak for a long time, and Renee didn’t push. She could tell that retelling this story was a lot for him.

“Trev chose ten of the best, ten of the most ruthless and cunning soldiers we’d ever known or found in the employee files. Even still, only six of us made it out alive and only four of the seven hostages.”

His hands were shaking, so Renee stood, went over to him, and did the only thing she could think of—she wrapped her arms around his waist. He laid a kiss on the top of her head, and she listened to his heart beating in his chest.

“We set it up so that it was supposed to be a simple smash and grab. Get in, get out and save the people. Sounded easy enough, sounded dangerous, but no more dangerous than challenges we’d faced a thousand times.”

“I’ll take it that things didn’t go the way you were expecting?”

“No, not at all, it was…a cluster fuck. I have nightmares about that mission, about many missions, but that one…it took almost a month to get rescued. We were stalked and picked off as we maneuvered first through the desert and then the mountains. We were the prey. My brother saved me on that mission. By the last week, I was losing it. He talked me down and kept me focused even as I watched my brothers got shot, blown apart, or—”

He shook his head and took a shuddering breath before he began again.

“When we got back, we were all told that we were dishonorably discharged for going off the books on an unsanctioned mission. I mean, we knew it was a possibility, but the people we saved…I can’t tell you who they were, but you’d think that at least they would vouch for us. The people we sacrificed our life for, day in and day out, saved themselves, and we got tossed under the bus.”

“The mission was all over the news. Reporters were saying that soldiers had stormed a border and were going to be dealt with appropriately.”

Arek pulled away and resumed his pacing.

“Yes, we had been exposed, but to save their own skin and to make sure the government remained clean, we had to sign off that we’d leave willingly or be court-martialed, charged, and thrown in jail. We were collateral damage and swept under the rug, to be forgotten. Maybe a week after we arrived back, we were contacted to join The Righteous, so we jumped at the chance. We had no idea what to do with ourselves. Our skill set was not exactly what McDs was looking for, you know?”

He came back to her, and this time it was him pulling her in close.

“The Righteous took care of us financially until Trev finished his degree and became a lawyer, and I well, I became the death that stalks those that deserve it most. I’m worried you will look at me and….”

She laid a finger upon his lips to stop him.

“I’m not scared of you,” Renee said. “I should be, and I think it speaks to just how screwed up I am that I’m not. I can’t say that I agree with or condone what you do. In fact, I don’t know how to think or feel about these strange missions you and this band of unknown people do.”

Renee stepped away from Arek and walked over to the window. There was a great view of the city lights in the distance. They felt magical, and it was peaceful seeing the swaying palm trees and the moon glittering off the ocean in the distance. As if all the issues in her life were suddenly gone.

“You kind of remind me of G.I. Joe.” She smiled as he laughed and shook his head.

“Pfft, I’m better than that.”

He hadn’t moved from where she’d left him, and even with the distance, his eyes captivated her, like shining blue crystals staring back at her from behind smoky glass.

“I’ll be honest—I don’t know if I can have a relationship with you. I so badly want J.J. to have a normal life, to grow up safe and not around violence. You are the epitome of violence. You drag it around with you like a body bag and wear it like your favorite jacket.”

He looked to the floor and then back up at her and her breath caught in her throat. Behind all the bravado and confidence was so much agony that she felt like she was the one bleeding.

“I want you, Renee. I won’t force you to be with me like Tyson, but I need you to know that I want whatever you can give me. You were meant for me in a way that I couldn’t have pictured. You make me feel—normal.” He screwed up his face in contemplation. “No, you make me feel, period.”