Page 169 of Deadfall

These feelings felt nostalgic and I realized I’d felt them back when she was younger. The fierce urge to protect her had been nearly all-consuming. And, while I’d been deployed for a lot of the twins' younger years, when I was with them, the need to keep them safe had oftentimes been suffocating.

“Great,” I muttered. “So, apparently that never goes away.”

I resumed walking and came through the trees in time to see Griffin touch her face in a hesitant gesture of comfort. I was definitely interrupting something. Good. Wasn’t that what a father was supposed to do? Maybe not to a twenty-six year old, but I had to make up for lost time somehow.

I knew they sensed me. Griffin whispered something briefly to Emersyn, and a small smile appeared on her face. I realized I desperately wanted to see her smile and laugh again. To be unburdened. I knew that was probably impossible after everything she’d been through, but maybe Griffin wasn’t so bad if he made her feel safe enough to smile. My eyes hardened as I watched him leave her and approach me. Griffin held up his hands as he walked past.

“Yeah, yeah—if I hurt her, you’ll kill me, right?”

“If it’s like that,” I said.

He stopped and turned to look back at Emersyn. I recognized the fierce look of protection laced with obsession.

“Yeah,” he sighed. “I think it is like that.”

Griffin looked at me and his eyes sharpened. I could tell there was a lot he wanted to say, but he chose his words carefully.

“She needs her father, North,” he said quietly. “Not a keeper.” He leaned in closer, and his tone lightened. “And you might not know this yet, but she is kind of a badass.”

“Of course she is,” I scoffed. “She’s my daughter.”

He nodded once and walked away. Emersyn crossed her arms over her chest and glared at me. The smile and ease she’d had with Griffin was gone.

“You going to tell me to stay away from him too?”

I looked around the small woods that bordered the back of the estate. It really was pretty here. I didn’t come back here nearly enough.

I shook my head. “Might threaten him a little though. The whole shotgun bit sounds kind of fun.”

She blinked, and her scowl weakened a little. “I think I’m too old for that now.”

“I don’t think there’s an age limit to fathers harassing their daughters’ dates,” I said dryly.

Emersyn frowned and looked away. “So, are you here to double down on what you said before?”

“I’d like to,” I sighed. “But, I’ve basically been told I’d be an idiot if I did that.”

The silence between us stretched. I didn’t know what else to say. I wasn’t ready to tell her she could come with us, but I also wasn’t about to tell her no again. She jerked her head toward my face.

“Were you jealous of mine or something?”

My lips tugged into a small smirk. I knew she was talking about the nearly identical scar that ran down the side of my face.

“That is what I like to call karma,” I grew serious. “A man named Cooper gave it to me. During our search for you it took us to some dark places. Long story, but you should hear it sometime.”

And just like that, the past surged between us. She stared, and a myriad of emotions swirled in her eyes, changing too quickly to keep up.

“There are moments when you feel like a stranger, but then sometimes it feels like just yesterday we were at the lake house—” She choked on the words. “You left me.”

Her words sliced through my chest. “You left me, and I know it was beyond your control,” her voice was breathless with unshed tears. “But, I still don’t know how to forgive you for it.”

80

EMERSYN

The pressure built up inside until I thought I was going to explode with it. My father took a step toward me, the words I’d said cut him—I could see the hurt in his eyes.

“I know—” He said.