Page 80 of 1001 Dark Nights: Bundle Forty-Two

“Oh, my god.” I cover my face and peek through my fingers.“Am I that obvious?”

“Is that a serious question?” Lotus leans back in her chairon the deck and tips her face to the sun. “He’s down bad.”

“So am I.” My smile fades. “This feels like paradise, butthere’s a lot of real world waiting for us when we get home.”

Lotus pushes oversized sunglasses atop her head and sets asobering gaze on my face. “I don’t know the full history of your past with Naz,but I saw parts of that awful documentary SportsCoaired that mentioned your brother. They showed clips of that game, and I knowthat kind of brought Naz attention he hadn’t gotten before, at least inbasketball.”

“Yeah. My brother resents Naz for what happened.”

“It was high school. A really longtime ago.”

“It was, but that’s the point where my brother’s lifestarted falling apart. In a lot of ways, he’s still there.”

“But that wasn’t Naz’s fault.”

“It’s irrational, but Cliff’s been through a lot. Most of itbecause of his own bad choices, but he’s just getting back on his feet and…” Iswallow the emotion, the remembered panic of Mama’s frantic call when Cliffoverdosed. “I don’t want to do anything that would derail him.”

“And you’re afraid your relationship with Naz would?”

“It wasn’t supposed to be a relationship. It was supposed tobe a fling because I’m attracted to him. I have been since the day we met. I’vewondered more than once how things could have been different for us, had theybeen different for Cliff, but it’s all tangled up. You can’t separate the two.”

“And now?” Lotus asks. “No one seeing the two of youtogether would think this ends when we leave this yacht.”

“I know.” I close my eyes and release a troubled sigh. Thethought of losing whatever Naz and I are building together, even at this earlystage, stirs a pang of loss.

“Hey.” Lotus reaches across the table, her eyescompassionate. “You still have a few days. Enjoy. We’ll cross that bridge whenwe come to it.”

“We?” I laugh and lift my brows.

“Yeah, we.” Lotus winks. “You’re Naz’s girl. You’re one ofus now.”

Naz’s girl.

That sings in my head and lights me up inside. I’m stillprocessing the implications of what that could mean if it becomes true—if I letit be true—when Lotus’s business partners, Yari andBillie, walk up on deck.

“Hey, bitches,” Lotus says, her smile easy and loving. “Ibarely recognized you without your guys attached to your hips.”

“They have real jobs and couldn’t stay the whole time.” Yarisighs, flopping into an empty chair at the table. “And look who’s talking. Yougot a whole baby from your man.”

Lotus rubs her little stomach, oiled up with sunscreen inher bikini, and beams. “He got me!”

“I really like these,” Billie says, her green eyes wideningas she studies the sketches on the table. “Is this for the Carnival theme nextsummer?”

“Yeah,” Lotus says. “Takira’s giving me the inside scoop.She’s from Trinidad and goes back all the time for Carnival.”

“That’s so cool.” Yari scoops her dark, curly hair into amessy bun, her arms even browner now from the sun than when we started ourtrip. “Can you teach us how to wine?”

“How to what?” Billie asks, peekingat us from beneath the wide-brim hat offering her fair skin shade. She’s aclassic redhead and has been careful with the sun.

“It’s dancing.” I laugh. “And I’ve never tried to teachanyone how to do it. It’s just…in me. I grew up watching my mama and aunts,cousins, sister—it’s something in our blood, and as soon as the music starts,it catches me.”

“I actually think I’m pretty good.” Lotus makes a show ofbrushing her shoulders off. “If I do say so myself.”

“I’d like to see that big belly wining,” Yari teases.

“Sun’s out.” Lotus scrapes her chair back, stands, andsmacks her ass. “Buns out. You got anything we can wine to?”

“Anything we can…” I giggle. “Oh, my god, Lo.”