What had been discarded was not this.
This was love and connection that was more beautiful and more transcendent than any intellectual stratum he'd believed was worth ascending to.
He'd been remade. There was nothing muted in him now, nothing theoretical, only Sullha, and the disbelief that she was his, that this woman who had every reason to fear his hands was arching into them, welcoming him, choosing him with her whole trembling body.
They found the rhythm together, and it climbed, and as the pleasure gathered, he felt his glands swell with venom.
He held back the bite the same way he held the wall, by the sheer power of his will, waiting for her to signal when she was ready.
When she broke apart beneath him, her inner muscles clamping around his shaft and his name tearing loose from her throat, she turned her head to the side and bared the long line of her throat to him.
An offering. A choice. Fully hers.
Yaaf licked the spot she had given him, preparing it for his bite with the analgesic in his saliva. Then he hissed and sank his fangs in.
She gasped as they pierced her skin, but then the venom entered her system, and her body relaxed, only to seize again and again as it triggered one climax after another, wave after wave of pleasure so overwhelming she wouldn't know how to process it and would black out.
He'd experienced this before with women he cared nothing about. The venom's effects were addictive, and the women in the brothel learned to crave it, chasing oblivion and hallucinogenic dreams.
It was different with Sullha. With her, it was a gift he felt fortunate to be able to give.
Through it all, he held the wall. The seven stayed sealed on the far side, doing their best to keep their distance and not intrude.
He let nothing slip through but his joy and gratitude. Not the sound of her voice, not the feel of her skin, not the taste of her. It was the hardest thing he had ever done, and he held on without even the smallest crack, because Sullha had asked him to, and because he loved her.
When the euphoric component of the venom took over, Sullha's body went loose beneath him. Her eyes rolled closed, and a blissed-out smile spread across her mouth as the euphoria lifted her up and carried her somewhere he couldn't follow. He knew where she was going from what other women had told him. They described colors that didn't exist on Earth, alien landscapes, and ghostly entities who smiled and waved as they passed above.
He withdrew his fangs, sealed the small wounds, and gathered her against his chest as she soared.
There was so much he wanted to tell her. That the wall had held. That the others had seen and heard nothing, that it had been theirs and only theirs from the first breath to the last.
But she was gone, soaring, and the telling would have to wait until she came back down.
For now, he only held her.
He pulled the blanket over them both and settled her head against his heart. He didn't want to think about what his venom might be doing to her blood, the transition it may have set in motion. From what Bowen had told him, it would come when it came, in a day or a week or two, and it might require more than one bite. Sometimes two or three were needed to start the process.
Tonight, it was enough that she was soaring, and that when she opened her eyes, he would be there to welcome her back.
40
ANNANI
Gertrude walked up to Annani's chair. "William is here with the earpieces, Clan Mother. He's upstairs in the waiting room and says he needs to show you how they work."
Annani had a pair and knew how to use them, but William had come to the lab on a Saturday to make sure she got them as soon as they were ready, so the least she could do was hear him out.
"Thank you, Gertrude." She rose, glanced at Khiann's sleeping face, and walked out.
"Clan Mother." William rose when she came in and dipped his head.
"Thank you for working overtime to bring the earpieces for my Khiann." She sat in the chair next to the one he had been in. "Please, sit down and show me how these work. Are they very different from the ones I have?" She reached into the pocket of her gown and pulled out a slim white case. "I almost never use them, but since you were promising an update in the old tongue, I figured I should carry them around so I could test them with Khiann before others rely on them for communication with him and his guards."
She did not like wearing the devices and only did so when Kian insisted she wear them while visiting Navuh. They filtered voice compulsion, which meant they filtered a great many other things as well, and she had never enjoyed the computer voices replacing the real ones, even when they had become deceptively realistic.
"The new model is a little different. That's why I wanted to show you how they work. I will have a new pair delivered to you as soon as we ramp up production."
She waved a dismissive hand. "No need. Mine work perfectly well and are barely used. I do not chase the latest innovations."