Page 41 of Guarding Glenda

Rushing to her, I gripped her face. “I should have fought. I should have held you down and told you what happened. I should have made you listen. I can’t change that now, Glenda. But now you know. And I know you know how I feel about you. I should have fought before but I’ll fight now. And I’ll keep fighting for you. Always.”

She sobbed harder as I cupped her cheeks, tipping her head so she’d look at me.

“Yeah I killed him. But now you know why. And I told him how stupid he was for what he did to you. And that when I finally got you, I’d never do any of the shit he did. He’d told me a thousand times to watch out for you, and with his last breath, he told me to take good care of you. So I’ve done everything I knew how to do for you since. I should have told you. I should have fought for you, even before then. But I can’t take it back. If I’d known…”

I didn’t want to throw blame at her. But fuck, if she had told me all of this before he died, who knows. Maybe I would have killed him sooner. Or at least taken her away somehow.

“Maybe I should have told you, too,” she whispered. “I’m just so broken, Leigh.”

She fell to me, pulling me close and digging her face into my chest.

“Let me hold the shattered pieces together, Glenda.”

She cried for so long. I eventually moved us to the sofa and pulled her to my lap. Once she stopped sobbing, I pushed her hair away from her eyes, and picked the Bruce hairs off her face.

I held one of them up and she grinned, her dimples deepening as she wiped her splotchy cheeks.

“Who told you?” I asked.

She blew out a heavy sigh. “Bama. I woke up from a weird dream and was freaking out but everyone was asleep. I texted Linny and she answered. But after my crazy rambling about what you and Bama were talking about, she woke him up.”

“Hmm. Kinda surprised he told you.”

“Me, too. But she told me he was upset that y’all fought.”

I jerked my head. “Bama didn’t say that.”

“Well no. Linny said that. That’s her man. She knows him.” She wiped under her eyes then threaded her fingers through her thick hair. “I can’t believe he was working with the Scorpions.”

My head leaned back on the sofa. “It was hard to swallow. We’d been friends so long. And brothers.”

She scoffed. “He lost himself. But I’m not sure I really ever knew him. When he saved me from that asshole squad leader, I thought he walked on the moon.” She sat up. “Turns out he just liked to fight. God, how could I be so stupid?”

I gripped her chin. “You can’t blame yourself for believing the version someone showed you.”

“But I stayed when he started to show me who he really was.”

“So did I. So did the others. We don’t turn our backs on each other. At least until we know someone turned their back on us.”

“Bama thought he was living a whole other life with them. Do you know how long?” I asked.

Scratching at my scruff, I told her, “Not sure. A few months at least. Did he tell you about, uh…”

“That he was planning to patch in with them and already had another Old Lady? Yeah. Bama told me.”

“I’m sorry, Glenda.”

“I’m sorry I didn’t give you the chance to explain.” She looked down. “And I’m sorry I was so horrible to you.”

“Hey, like I said. You can’t blame yourself for believing the version you were shown. I should have just told you. But you were already distraught and then. Ya know.” She had a miscarriage days after Reggie died. She’d always talked about having kids, so I knew that had to be hard on her. I should have been there for her.

“I was sad that I lost it. But knowing what I know now. I dunno. The thing is, I knew something was up. I just didn’t know what. And I kept hoping it was just the drugs and if he’d only gotten clean then maybe… Things would be different. And he was the first person who ever stood up for me. So I stayed loyal. But you…”

“I what?” I asked, tugging her closer.

Her hazel eyes finally met mine. “You’re the only man to hold me without hurting me.”

My heart raced. “Because I don’t want to hurt you, Glenda. But I guess I’ve done a shitty job at that.”