Page 101 of Finding My Charming

“He left me, Ari.” I continued gazing at the opposite wall. I needed to speak in small bursts; otherwise, the emotions would become too much, and I knew I wouldn’t be able to stop the tears once they came. “I told him about my family, and he left.”

“I know, Elle. I’m so, so sorry.”

“That’s not what was supposed to happen.”

She lifted all my hair and I could feel her separate it for a braid.

“I was supposed to tell him everything, and we’d feel closer to each other, then we’d ride off into the sunset.”

“Life isn’t a movie, honey. We all thought things would go differently. No one meant for this to happen.”

I should have known she’d already been talking to my family.

“So, my mom told you everything?”

“Your phone’s been off since Sunday. I didn’t know if you were dead or kidnapped or pissed at me. I called her, and she caught me up.”

I sniffed. Talking about it was definitely making it more real.

“Sorry. I thought that if I kept it off, then I couldn’t know if Dallin had or hadn’t tried to contact me.”

“Schrödinger’s cat?”

“Exactly.”

She dropped my hair and slammed her hands on the bed. “Elle, that’s no way to live. You can’t just hang in the balance. What if he’s been calling and texting you and thinks you’re mad at him?”

I sighed and barely got a whisper out with my throat growing tighter by the second. “What if he hasn’t? What if I turn it on, and there isn’t a single message? What then, Ari?”

That was it. That was what finally made me snap. A sob slipped out, and within seconds, tears drenched my face, and breathing became increasingly difficult. The hollow pain was alive and tearing through every part of my soul. I knew it. I could feel it. He hadn’t tried to get ahold of me. I knew him. If he wanted to see me or talk to me, he would have come back. That was why I hadn’t left my spot by the window. I knew. He would come here if he wanted me.

Dallin hadn’t come, and he wasn’t going to.

He was gone.

my parents offered to take me out on the night of the full moon. They were no doubt attempting to distract me, but nothing, not even a meteor strike or something equally as unusual and devastating could take my mind off Dallin.

April had even stopped by on her way out with friends and told me she was sorry for putting pressure on me and for the way things had ended. She asked if I wanted to go out with her, which proved that she was being honest. No way, under normal circumstances, would she ever invite me to hang with her friends.

I must look even worse to than I feel.

Beth and Finn called a little later and asked if I wanted to go over to their house for a movie night, which was tempting, but knowing the offer had been made out of pity made me turn them down.

But when Grandma called to invite me out for dessert, I knew I’d hit rock-bottom. My entire family was worried. I never would have thought that my embarrassment and pain would be the one thing to bring them together on something. It was nice in some respects that they loved me enough to try to cheer me up, but the more they tried the sadder I felt.

I’d already told Ari I needed to be alone tonight, so she’d only tried three times to drag me out. Her promise of my favorite ice cream hadn’t done the trick, so she’d finally conceded and made me promise to call her tomorrow so we could begin the healing process correctly with a day of shopping and eating junk food, finishing off with a movie marathon of romances that didn’t end well. I was actually looking forward to it, but first I needed to survive this night alone.

It was seven, and everyone was gone, so I slipped into my favorite pair of flannel Christmas pajama pants and an old shirt of my dad’s. My mom had offered to order a pizza for me before they left, but I knew eating fatty, greasy food in my pajamas, alone, while the sun was still up, probably wouldn’t make me feel better.

I ended up making a peanut-butter-and-honey sandwich and grabbing a bag of chips before nuzzling into my favorite spot on the couch. I scrolled through the channels and settled on a weekend marathon of secret-agent movies — no romance or love, just guns, bombs, and fight scenes — just what a girl needed when her heart felt like it had been shot up and left for dead.

About an hour later, the movie ended, so I cleaned up my plate and chips during the commercial break before the next one started. I was neck-deep in the freezer, digging for chocolate-chip ice cream when the doorbell rang. I banged my head on a shelf on my way out and cursed whoever was interrupting my pity party.

No one should be coming over. I told them all to leave me alone tonight.

I debated ignoring it and focusing on my ice cream excavation, but another knock came. Someone was determined to speak to me. I shuffled my feet down the front hall and didn’t bother to look to see who it was. Someone in my family was about to receive a verbal lashing for interrupting me. I swung the door open and froze.

Dallin was standing in front of me holding out a beautiful bouquet of coral dahlias. My eyes flickered from his face to the flowers until he finally spoke. “I’m so sorry, Elle.”