Page 47 of Game Misconduct

I turned onto the street and crossed the four lanes to the left turn lane, focusing so much on the traffic, hoping he’d let it go. I got the information I was after, and was relieved to be able to know where he stood. I didn’t expect him to keep pressing me.

“Because I’m also her friend.”

I could see him watching me out of the corner of my eye.

“And you want to be her only friend?”

I shook my head. “No, of course not. I’m glad you two are friends.”

He chuckled. “Oh man. You’ve got it bad.”

I met his gaze and quickly looked away. “I don’t know what you’re talking about.”

“Yes, you do,” he countered.

“She and I are just friends,” I clarified, for both of us.

“But you wish you were more.”

I closed my eyes and took a deep breath. The realization that struck me the night at her place––that I might actually feel something more than friendship for Vivi––was something I wished I could squash and forget about for a while, but that wasn’t how things like this worked.

There was too much at stake. At least, that’s how it felt to me. I wasn’t willing to lose the connection I had with her just because I had more feelings for her than I expected. She was the first person in my life, in years, if ever, that simply saw me as I was. She didn’t try to change me to meet the expectations she had in her mind of who or what I should be. She didn’t see me as just a hockey player. I wasn’t some novelty to brag about. She made sure I was comfortable whenever we were together. She cared. She thought about me before herself.

Maybe that was just friendship, but it didn’t feel like that.

The desire to be near her was driving me crazier each day. It was like my body and mind craved her. The peace she brought me. The gentle way she pushed me without ever expecting anything, like when she invited me to dinner with her friends. She noticed the looks but didn’t play into the attention as other women had before. She didn’t want to be seen with me for some sort of notoriety. She was perfectly content hanging out on her couch, watching my favorite movies. It was me that wanted to step outside of my comfort zone for her. I wanted to take her out and show her off. I wanted her to wear my jersey so people knew she was with me. It was silly. Juvenile even, but she brought that out in me. She made it okay for me to not be so serious. To open up and laugh and joke. She gave me a break from the daily pressures of my career.

With her, we were just Vivi and Parker.

“Yeah, I think so.”

He bumped his elbow into mine. “Good.”

“Good?” I repeated. “Why is that good?”

“Because I really like her. I’m going to be protective of her, no matter what, because she’s one of the rare ones. She’s sweet and honest and real in a way that's hard for guys like us to find. But I also like you. I think you both have something to offer the other, a way to better each other. That’s what relationships are meant to do. Not change the other person, but lift each other up. Together.”

That was more than I expected him to say. It might have been the most he’d ever said to me, but every word pierced my heart.

“That’s how I see her.” It was shocking how well he understood us. Me.

“I know. That’s why I think you should tell her how you feel.”

I turned into the parking lot and waved at the guard. “You really think so?”

“Yes,” he answered simply.

“What if she doesn’t feel the same? We agreed to be friends, and I really like how things are now. I don’t want to ruin that.”

He grinned. “You’ll never know for certain until you try. She’s the only one that can tell you how she feels, but I have a good feeling about it.”

He was friends with her, so maybe he knew something I didn’t. Or just understood her well enough to guess.

“Come on, if we’re late, we’ll be stuck doing drill lines for an extra hour.” He got out of the car like things were completely normal.

I climbed out and reached for my bag, feeling off-kilter. I was all mixed up. While I had a sense of relief that Mitch didn’t also have feelings for Vivi, I was now weighed down by the pressure of acting on this information.

Nothing had to happen now. That was the only peace I had. I didn’t need to go running off to find her to admit my feelings this moment. I didn’t even need to do anything for the next week, or longer. There was no rush.