Page 38 of Center Ice

I narrowed my eyes, took a huge forkful of cake, and shoved it in my mouth.

“Hey, you need to share!” She laughed and took an equally big bite. After she swallowed, she watched me. “So, did your friend change your mind on things?”

I shrugged. “It definitely made me think.”

She stayed quiet while I thought of how to tell her what I was thinking. It wasn’t like a life’s worth of thoughts could be undone in a day. Could they?

The tiny bit of doubt I’d always hidden had grown this week. Seeing how happy my friends were was a major chink in my defense. Then realizing that I wanted what they had. Admitting I was wrong wasn’t the hardest part. It was accepting the truth.

I could have all that. I could find love and share my life with someone. I was the only one standing in my way. I was the one holding myself back. There was no one else to blame.

If I wanted something, it was up to me to figure it out. I made my ultimate dreams come true already. I made it to the NHL. I won championships. If anyone should believe in the impossible, it was me.

So I needed to let down the walls I’d built in the name of protecting myself.

I might get hurt. I might get my heart broken. But I might also meet someone that brought joy into my life. I might fall in love.

Deciding it was worth the risk was step one. Now it was time to act.

“I know now that I want to try.”

Her eyes widened. “That’s a pretty big change.”

She understood. That was one of my favorite things about Dani. She somehow got me without me having to pour out every thought and feeling I had.

“You make it easy,” I blurted, and she cocked her head. “I mean, talking and opening up.”

“Yeah?” she asked as her lips curved. “It’s weird that I know some of your deepest thoughts, and we skipped over the basics.”

I chuckled. “That’s true. What do you want to know?”

“Did you always want to be a professional hockey player?”

I set down my fork. “Since I started playing at six, pretty much. My mom originally signed me up because our neighbor played, so his mom could pick me up from school and take me to practices and games. It was more of a form of child care for a while. After two years, it was time to either move on to the more serious league or stop playing. My coach told her I was really good for my age and strongly recommended I continue. She didn’t have enough money to keep up with me outgrowing my gear every six months or so, though. Coach talked with some team sponsors and created a scholarship program so I could keep playing. Thanks to him, I eventually moved on to the next league, then the next, until I was in the major juniors. That’s the professional league for sixteen to twenty-one-year-olds.”

“So you must have been really good.” She smiled. “All because your mom needed a babysitter.”

“Pretty much.”

“That’s crazy to think that a decision made when you were a little kid could have life-long consequences.”

“What about you?” I asked. “Did you always want to be a wedding planner?”

She leaned back in her chair. “Well, I wanted to be a princess first, but my parents explained that with the limited number of available royals that was pretty unlikely. Then I thought I could be a bride, but they told me I can’t get married every day, so weddings seemed like the next best thing. I thought all brides were princesses on their wedding day.”

“So you were a little girly-girl?” I guessed.

“Oh, yes. I was all pink and bows and unicorns. I never played sports because I was afraid of getting hurt.”

I let out a loud laugh. “That’s why I loved playing! I could rough house and wrestle without getting in trouble.”

She shook her head. “Oh, no. I was much too busy with my dolls to even think of getting dirty or chasing a ball.”

I could see her as a little girl, always in dresses, fussing over her dolls and making them get married every day.

“What’s your favorite food?” I asked.

“Lasagna,” she announced without having to think about it.