Page 56 of Penalty Kill

No, words weren’t what she needed from me. She needed to see what she meant to me, to us.

“Ready to go?”

They agreed and we arrived at the hospital a few minutes later. They proudly carried their cards and held on to the balloon together. We signed in as visitors, and then a nurse took us to her room. She was sitting up, which was a huge improvement from the day before. When she saw us, her whole face lit up. Even with dark bags under her eyes and hair that needed to be brushed, she was so incredibly beautiful. My heart ached to reach out and take her hand. To touch her and know she was okay.

“There are my favorite boys.”

I wanted to believe I was included in that, but she never even glanced my way. All of her attention was on the twins.

Milo and Finn ran to her, and I had to grab their shoulders to keep them from jumping on her. “Remember she’s hurt, so you have to be extra gentle.”

I dropped the chocolate on her tray next to the bed and lifted the boys in my arms so they could see her better. She had some bruising on her left cheek, but overall didn’t look like she’d been in a terrible accident. Her injuries were internal, which was difficult to explain to the boys. Neither of them had broken a bone, so they had no idea the pain she was in, let alone the emotional suffering I feared she was dealing with. Because of me—well Olivia and the paparazzi—she lost the ability to have her own children. That thought nearly killed me. If she’d never met me, none of this would have happened. She would be happy and healthy. She could continue to pursue all of her dreams.

“How are you feeling?”

She smiled, another improvement from yesterday. “I’m okay. The pain is much more manageable.”

“And you can sit,” I pointed out.

“Yeah, they have me all set up with pillows and a donut so I can sit up. I couldn’t stand being on my back anymore.”

“You got a donut?” Finn asked excitedly.

She laughed. “Yeah, but it’s not the yummy kind.”

“Aw.” He pouted then seemed to remember he had a card for her. “Here, this is for you!”

Milo held his out as well. “We didn’t make them, but Daddy helped us write in them.”

She accepted both and smiled up at the balloon. “Thank you, guys. This makes me feel better.”

She gingerly opened Finn’s card and read it aloud for him. “Thank you, Finn.”

She read Milo’s card and reached out for the boys. I dipped them close so they could hug, but Milo took that as an invitation to climb into bed next to her. He was on her right side, but I still reached down to pull him away while also keeping Finn from jumping out of my arms.

“It’s okay,” she said sweetly. She situated Milo next to her then patted her other side for Finn. I helped him lay down without touching her. He nuzzled against her arm, and she turned on cartoons for them to watch while they snuggled.

I took a step back and admired how naturally they fit together. How much peace the boys got from being around her. How she seemed to need them as much as they needed her.

“They ate their breakfast without me having to remind them.”

My random announcement made her smile. “That’s good.”

“They even brought their plates to the sink when they were done. I’ve never asked them to do that.”

She rubbed their backs. “Good job, boys. You surprised Daddy.”

They nodded without taking their eyes off the TV.

“You did that.”

She glanced down. “They love learning and finding ways to help me.”

“You did that, too.” I pulled the chair closer to her side. “You’ve changed them. And me.”

She finally met my eyes, looking uncertain, so I continued. “I’m not asking you to stay forever. I’m not saying you can’t leave if you need to, either. I want you to know that you are a part of our family, but please don’t let that scare you. I want you to come home with us. I’ll make sure you have everything you need. I’ll have a nurse come to help you and make sure you’re healing correctly. I want you to accept my help knowing there are no expectations afterward. If you want to leave when you’re back on your feet that’s fine, but please let me do this for you.”

She sighed and seemed to consider it. “Okay.”