Page 61 of A Bookish Story

“Yes, it does, because you’re too young to be sidelined with permanent heartache.”

“I’m not sidelined and it’s not permanent. It’s only been six months.”

“But when are you going to get back on the horse?”

“Maybe I should first figure out why in the world I chose to be with Chris in the first place. He was all wrong for me. A gym bro when I’m an introverted intellectual. He didn’t even like to read books. I should have known then we were doomed. Was I that desperate not to be alone? Because that makes me sound too much like my mother!”

“Hmm. Well, he’s handsome and has a job unlike some other guys you’ve dated.”

“Like that’s enough? I wanted sparks. I wanted⁠—”

“What your parents had.”

We’re quiet for a moment, both of us, because we both know it’s true. I’ve been so busy chasing after a fantasy, a moment in time, that maybe what I’m missing is something real.

“What about professor McHottie?” She bats her eyelashes. “Did it ever occur to you that true love might be right in front of you?”

That’s a bit of a cliché but I’m going to let that go because I know she’s trying to speak my language.

“We’d be a workplace romance,” I explain. “But weirdly enough, while that’s cute in a romance book, in real life it can result in a lawsuit. I’m sure Ryan wants to avoid one of those.”

“Oh my gosh, just tell him you’ll never sue and kiss him silly!”

“No. I’m not going to ruin our working relationship.”

That’s the trouble with real life. Tropes aren’t as cute and endearing because you have to live with the ramifications. If only I could live in a romance novel. Life would be perfect. I picture my father dipping my mother in the kitchen while they danced and I giggled. They were perfect. Doesn’t anyone else get that? Why can’t I have it?

“Your mami is the most beautiful woman in the world,” Papi would say. “And she married me!”

“I’ve been thinking about what you said the other night,” Sofia says, pulling me out of my memory. “And I talked to my mother about old times. She wants to get together with your mother. She says they have a lot to talk about.”

“I didn’t think they even liked each other.”

“I’m not sure they do, but Mami said something interesting when I was over for dinner. Apparently your mother met Eddie first.”

“That’s common knowledge. They were both at university together. But then she saw my father and the rest is history. They fell head over heels in love.”

“Yes, but you realize she was more than friends with Eddie when they met. She dated him.”

“What?” It comes out like a sputter. “You must be wrong about that.”

That’s not right. It’s not the story I’ve been told.

“What’s the big deal? It wasn’t serious, and she obviously much preferred your dad. She settled down with him, she loved him. You’re not wrong about your parents. They had the great love story.”

“But…why didn’t anyone ever tell me this?”

“Ancient history. There’s no reason to talk about it unless you’re like my mami and love to gossip.”

Tia Carmelita does love to gossip.

“Maybe.”

But having either imagined or actually seen what I did, I can’t deny this new information bothers me.

I don’t love anyone messing around with the picture I have in my head of my parents and the love story set in stone in my mind. First love, true love, soulmates. This is the story that plays in my mind when I imagine a forever kind of love.

This is the story I don’t ever want to let go.