Page 88 of The Gentlewoman Companion

She was chewing her lip again.

“Yes?” he asked.

“I’ve been mending Lady Halverton’s clothes. Her tailor is extremely talented. I wish to apprentice to him.”

James felt a smile creep across his face. “It pained you to ask.”

“The hardest words I’ve ever said.” She smiled back at him, a grin that transformed her solemn face into something brilliant. “You do realize the tailors’ guild does not allow female apprenticeships. You will have to convince him to take me.”

“Consider it done. And I will set up a trust. Your inheritance.”

She frowned. “We can discuss that later. In the meantime, Samuel and I cannot remain in Grosvenor Square. However beautiful this home, it is not comfortable to us.”

“I hope to find Tom within the week. After that…would you agree to settle in Stroud, close to my estate? We will find lodgings close to your apprenticeship.” Leaving town to establish his siblings in the country meant leaving Louisa, but she and his mother would not remain in London forever. However painful the separation, he must see to his siblings. Meg was correct. Their presence was untenable.

Margaret nodded slowly. “I’ve never seen the countryside and may not like it, but it is sensible to move for an apprenticeship. What will we do if the boy is not found?”

“We cannot wait upon that. I will settle my affairs here by the time the search’s deadline arrives—which reminds me…” He hesitated. “I wrote a petition, asking for wardship of you and Samuel. Will you allow me to send it?”

She glanced at Samuel, her face softening. “So long as I agree to the terms.”

James left the room a great deal less burdened. His siblings deserved stability, and he could not be easy until their needs were met. Susan would benefit from country air and a mother’s attention. He must prioritize them.

But Louisa.

Since holding her in his arms, he could not remember what scruples had kept him from declaring himself. Whatever their struggles, they could meet them better together. If they were engaged, they might write during the months apart.

He left the nursery in search of Louisa, not to propose—though he had half a mind to—but to tell her of the progress he’d made with Meg. His mother was alone in the drawing room.

“Looking for Louisa?” she asked.

He started.

She laughed. “Children imagine their parents are daft. Louisa is bidding farewell to her brother.”

“She didn’t tell me.” His chest tightened. “And before we could meet him? A pity.” There was so much she kept from him.

“I have a list of errands I intended for Louisa, but she may not return before evening. Are you willing to complete them? I trust no one else.”

If he went out, he could stop at Bow Street for news and take his petition to Chancery in person. “Of course. And Mother, I should inform you that I’m taking Margaret and Samuel with me to Stroud at week’s end. It seems she wants to be a mantua maker, and I promised to obtain her an apprenticeship.”

She went to him and took both his hands. “I chastised you for choosing to stay out of the House, but you chose the more important stewardship. I honor your principles.” She patted his cheek. “Now, here is the list, and it must be done, for tomorrow I host the salon.” She sung the last words in delighted notes.

“London suits you,” he said.

“Had I known what I was missing, I might have ignored the pride that kept me away.”

He winced.

“Forgive me; that was callous. I forget how fresh your wound is.”

“I suppose it helps to see you’ve become at peace with it.”

“Never at peace. But I did nothing wrong, and as I move forward, choosing not to let the betrayal hinder me, it has loosened its grip.”

James considered her words: had he let his father’s misdeeds hinder him? While James had taken steps to disconnect himself from his father’s disloyalty, he was not so resolved as his mother to move in his expected circles. Attending parliament still felt wrong, but in time he might find healing as his mother had.

James travelled through London, stopping at the haberdashery to collect his mother’s order, the milliner for a hat, even a warehouse from which his mother had somehow managed to order a Meissen tea service. He spoke with Mr. Fielding, who had no news of Tom, and delivered the petition to Chancery.