Page 32 of Obey

What the fuck had I been thinking? This was a man who had regularly tried to kill me with his bare fists, and let everyone else do the same. And now I was going to strip down and let him use a knife on me, thinking he was turning me on by pressing the blade into my skin? I was actually going to make myself that vulnerable to the psychopath who’d killed two of my friends in the last week?

Stupid. Beyond stupid. Suicidal.

Saraya, get a grip! I shouted at myself mentally.

This was risky, yes, but it was also my best chance at pulling a weapon on him and getting the fuck out of here. This also wasn’t the time to suddenly freeze up. If I got nervous, he’d see it, and he’d know that I didn’t actually want to be here.

He might even guess that it was a trap, and if he did that, there would be no way for me to save myself. Even worse if he decided to manhandle me and ended up finding the switchblade I’d moved from the mattress into my back pocket.

My eyes shot around the room at the other men here, and the few women, and I tried to take stock of the situation. Everyone else was nearly as drunk as Devil and had stopped paying attention to me an hour ago, at least. They’d all been shocked to see me at first, but Devil had pulled me into his lap and acted like everything was normal, and eventually everyone else had followed his lead. They’d gradually stopped staring and watching what they said, and before long it was like old times, all of them saying whatever popped into their heads.

I’d learned a whole lot more about how Devil was running his crew these days. Including some secrets I was sure he wouldn’t have wanted me to know.

Including what they thought of the coming war with the Banshees.

If I got out of here alive and found Knight before everything went down, I planned on filling him in on all of it.

But that was feeling like an awfully big ‘if’ at the moment. Devil was looking way too sober now, and no one else was paying attention. None of them would make a move to save me if he came for me. Hell, they probably wouldn’t have even if they were sober. They all thought he was fucking invincible. Everyone except Sioux. I wondered where she was—and if I could trust her to come through for me tonight the way we’d planned.

Damn, I hoped so. I needed a friend right now, and I didn’t think my chances of getting out of this alive were very good if she fucked me over.

Suddenly, Devil was on his feet and stalking toward me, a look of intense focus on his face. He reached me within three strides, grabbed my hair, and yanked my head back, growling in pleasure at the sight of me spread out before him like that.

“I’ve missed you more than you could know,” he said quietly, leering.

I tried to smile like I was actually enjoying the attention—or like I actually enjoyed the thought of him missing me. I tried very hard to quell the nerves rushing through me at how close he was. I needed him to believe I was actually here for him, and actually liking it.

I needed him to believe that right until the moment I slammed the knife into his chest.

And my smile must have been convincing, because he grinned back, and then slammed his mouth down against mine. His tongue pushed into my mouth so quickly that I didn’t have time to prepare, thick and sluggish and far, far too deep down my throat, and I nearly gagged at the taste of him. I fought the urge, though, and tilted my head so he had better access to my mouth. He groaned against me and pulled me in closer, and I could feel that he was already hard, his cock pressing against my stomach in its need to be released from his pants.

I wanted to throw up. I wanted to reach into my pocket, grab the small switchblade Sioux had given me, and ram it into his stomach, just to get him off me.

Instead, I hummed as well, acting like I was into the whole thing and just as anxious to move forward as he was.

He pulled back, the glint in his eye telling me that I was really in trouble now, and whirled on the rest of the group. “We’re going to bed. You lot better shut the fuck up within the hour, or get the fuck out. I don’t want any noise interrupting my night.”

The silence that fell over the crowd was absolute, and I watched them process what he was saying. I watched their eyes turn to me, considering, and then narrow as they realized what it would mean if I was back. Men who had thought to cozy up to Devil would have to take me into account, and women who had thought they might make a run at being his old lady would have to bow out. Everyone would have to get used to me being there again, and seeing as how he was currently acting like I actually mattered, for the first time in years, they were going to have to get used to taking a knee to me.

Seeing the growing discomfort on the faces of men who had taken joy in raping me and then beating me almost made the whole thing worth it.

Almost.

Devil took my arm and yanked me toward the hallway and I stopped thinking about anyone but myself and my own safety.

He pushed me down the hall, his actions getting rougher and rougher as we went, and I hurried to stay ahead of him, hating the feel of his hands on me. I wanted to get to the room and get this over with so I could get the hell out of here. I didn’t want to think about what was going to come next.

Unfortunately, though, I was going to have to experience it in real life before I got to leave.

When he shoved me through the door, smacking my ass on the way by and then slamming the door behind him, I knew the time had come. I had to stop thinking about what was going to happen—worrying about it, fearing it, dreading it—and get ready to actually do the deed.

No, not that one. Because no matter what Devil thought, we weren’t actually going to get naked in this room. He wasn’t actually going to get to touch me. And if things went the way I needed them to, he’d never even get to touch a knife.

If I was fast—and smart, lucky, and insane enough—to do what I needed to do.

If I wanted to get back to Knight badly enough that I was willing to gamble everything, including my own life, on the moves it would take to get there.

Unfortunately, things didn’t go the way I needed them to.