Page 47 of Dare to be Wicked

“Not often,” Lottie admitted. “Though she will for the little ones if no one else is around to listen. She’s too afraid of making a fool of herself.”

He turned his head to meet her gaze and, though the room was dim, she did not need light to remember the exact shade of his eyes, that distinct turquoise that made her think of hot, sunny places and exotic seas.

“You’ve never cared about that, have you?”

Lottie shook her head. “I don’t think about it. I just react, which is not always a good thing. I’m too impulsive.”

“Like taking off your clothes in a summerhouse in front of some wicked fellow.”

“In front of the man I love,” she amended, and she heard his breath catch.

“Do you, Lottie?”

She nodded, emotion tugging at the words. “I always have, and it’s been so dreadful, Cass, pretending that I didn’t mind it was Eliza you wanted. I w-was so horribly jealous, and I felt so wretched for being such a hateful creature, to envy my own… my own s-sister.”

Her voice grew thick and trembled, and Cassius slid his arm about her and pulled her close.

“You could never be hateful. You’ve done nothing wrong. It’s all my fault for being such an imbecile and not seeing what was right in front of me.”

Lottie shook her head, unable to agree with that. “Oh, no. I never faulted you. Of course you wanted Eliza. She’s so much nicer than me. She’s kind and patient and never loses her temper, and she’s… s-so bloody perfect it makes my teeth hurt!”

Cassius laughed and Lottie made a sound of exasperation.

“You see? I told you I’m not nice.”

“I think you’re nice,” he said softly. “And I think you’re perfect too, just a different kind of perfect.”

“Yes, the imperfect kind,” she retorted with a little sniff.

“Perfect for me.” He reached out and traced the shape of her lips with a fingertip. “When I was away, I had the most marvellous time. For the first six months I was immersed in my work and in everything I was discovering. I made new friends and travelled, saw the most beautiful scenery, but little by little I noticed this longing for… for something. I thought I was just homesick at first, for my family and friends, then I decided it was you and Eliza, and it was. Only… It was you Lottie, and it wasn’t until you burst onto the terrace that day that I realised it.”

Lottie felt her face heat.

“I meant to be well-behaved and act like a lady. I did, truly. Only I had bottled up my feelings for so long and when I saw you it… it all sort of exploded out of me.” She shook her head. “Papa says I’m about as subtle as a brick, and he’s right, you know.”

“I know,” he said, smiling as she flashed him an indignant glance. “I like it!”

“Oh, you can’t,” she protested. “I’m horribly gauche.”

“I like it,” he said again, his voice firm. “It’s honest. You are honest about what you feel, and you say what you think. I admire that.”

She was silent for a moment, considering. “Do you remember the Peculiar Ladies and their hat?”

“You mean our mothers’ friends and their hat of dares?”

Lottie nodded. “Cat found it, and Eliza and I took one. Mine… Mine was to be wicked. That’s why I undressed for you. Well, partly why. It was wicked, wasn’t it?”

Cassius grew very still, and she saw his Adam’s apple bob.

“Yes,” he said, his voice low and gravelly.

Lottie became aware of a shiver running over her, excitement stirring in her belly.

“I’m not sure it was wicked enough, though. You know… to complete my dare.”

She held her breath, watching him watch her.

“Was it not?”