Page 20 of Lovestrung

“Just didn’t know you were dating.”

“I’m not, not really.” I dragged in a deep breath. “It’d be stupid to start seeing someone just before I leave, don’t you think?”

There it was again, that line between his eyes that I wanted to erase. But I didn’t have the right.

“Yeah.”

I wanted to ask him if he was seeing someone special – it was on the tip of my tongue, waiting for me to ask him, but in the end, I chickened out.

“Well, um…Is there anything else you need?”

His eyes flashed briefly with heat, but he averted his gaze and shook his head.

“No, thanks. But…”

“But?”

He looked up, and the anguish in his eyes made me long to wrap my arms around him, telling him that no matter what, everything would be all right.

“I’m so sorry, Pen.”

“For what?”

“For staying away so long. I…I’ve missed you. I’ve missed the way we were together – our friendship, I mean. Most of all, I’m sorry I’ve hurt you by keeping my distance.” He raised his hand and placed his palm on my cheek, his eyes boring into mine. “I guess it hit me hard, seeing you again tonight, and I just want you to know that if I could turn back the clock – go back in time – I would.”

My breaths came out in short spurts of air, my nipples almost grazing his chest, and when his eyes flickered down to my lips, my tongue slicked out to wet them.

“I forgive you, Ethan,” I whispered, my voice hoarse.

The heat returned to his eyes for a moment, but then he released my chin. I must’ve imagined the burn because when he gave me a crooked smile, he looked the same as before – friendly, yet detached.

“Thank you.”

Nodding, I took a step closer and tilted my head at his arm still blocking my way out.

“Let me go?” I whispered. I didn’t know where that had come from, and I grimaced as soon as the words left my mouth.

“I…” he sighed, and again stopped. My gaze flickered down to his bare chest, captivated once more by the droplets of water. The throbbing between my legs intensified, leaving me lightheaded with need. If I didn’t leave now, I’d do or say something that neither of us would ever come back from. I ducked underneath his arm, escape and the toy in my desk drawer the only things occupying my mind.

“Goodnight,” I called out as I almost ran down to my bedroom.

“Goodnight.”

I shut my bedroom door, twisting the lock, before I turned out the lights and jumped on my bed. Keeping my mouth shut tight, I did the only thing that I’d already been doing for years that would make me fall asleep.

I made myself come with thoughts about Ethan. I used my imagination and disappeared into a world of bliss and heat, but this time, I promised myself that it would be the last time.

* * *

“Morning!”

I skipped into the kitchen and found Gramps at the kitchen island, reading the local newspaper.

“Morning, girl,” he mumbled, clearly absorbed reading if the frown between his eyebrows was anything to go by. Amused, I gently pushed his glassed tilting precariously up his nose. He nodded once in thanks, and I went to the coffee pot on the counter. I reached for my favorite mug from the cabinet above that said, Blogging Is Sexy and poured a hefty amount and a dab of coffee creamer. The scent teased my nostrils, and after I’d had my first sip, I immediately felt like a human instead of a hag.

Wondering where Ethan was, I went back to Gramps and pulled out a chair.

“Where’s our dog whisperer?” I asked.