Page 43 of Love You To Pieces

With my real friends; not Ariana, Tyler, and Scotty.

With my cat who got hit three years ago, leaving me in a shitty apartment, alone, without a shoulder to cry on.

With Emma, who will never speak to me again. Who has no idea where I am, what’s happened, and who probably never will. She’ll just keep me blocked, assume I’ve moved on, and never spare me another thought.

Fox is right, and I hate to admit that he doesn’t know just how right he is.

What is there for me back home, other than suspicion, loneliness, and a life that’s fallen apart all around me, no matter how I’ve tried to put it back together?

Maybe it’s better, I think, as I turn my face up into the hot water. Maybe it’s better to die here, to become part of the fucking food chain; ending up just another missing person who will never be found, and whose disappearance will never be solved.

CHAPTER SIXTEEN

Amidst dreams of getting chopped to bits with a chainsaw and watching my organs get fed to Pearl, it takes a while for the knocking to really break through. When it does, my eyes open, and I find myself sitting upright, trembling, before I really know that I’m awake.

“I-I’m up,” I gasp instinctively, my head reeling as I try to separate my dream from reality. “I’m awake, I swear, I…” I trail off, my words fading while I blink stupidly into the fading light from the other side of the lacy curtains. The clock on the bedside table reads just after seven thirty, and I squint at it, thinking that it absolutely cannot be right. There’s no way I’ve been asleep this long without waking up at least once.

But judging by the way the sun is casting pink and orange streaks across the sky and dipping below the faraway trees, that’s exactly what time it is. I rub my eyes and the knocking comes again, softer this time.

“Yeah, I’m up,” I say again. “I’m awake.” Biting back an apology and pushing to my feet, hating how my eyes feel like they’re full of sand from crying earlier. The back of my throat is no longer sore, at least, and I’m hungry, rather than still nauseous.

Not that I’ll ever be able to eat again.

“You okay, darlin’?” Fox’s drawl sends a shiver down my spine as I remember this morning, and worse than that, what I needed to come to terms with in the workshop outside. When I don’t answer, he continues, “I heard about what happened in the workshop. I, uh…” I hear him sigh, and he shifts his weight, making the boards creak under him outside. “I told you not to go out there for a reason. Not because I was just being a jerk.”

I still don’t speak, and the silence stretches, becoming uncomfortable. “Look, dinner’s about ready. We’ve got Mrs. Hewitt’s biscuits and, well, Deacon really isn’t that bad of a cook.”

Nausea churns in my stomach, and I swallow back bile. “That’s, umm. That’s okay,” I call, though my voice is shaky. “I’m not hungry.” It’s a lie. I’m starving, and I’m sure by now my stomach is chowing down on my other organs…which is a pretty sickening thought, given my current situation.

Fox sighs, and I can hear him shifting uncomfortably again, like he’s not enjoying this conversation any more than I am. “I’m not really giving you an option.” His words are carefully neutral and devoid of anything that might make them sound like a threat, but that’s what they are. Even if he doesn’t want to admit it.

As a wave of irritability goes through me, I bite my lip and shake my head. Even if he doesn’t see it, somehow the motion still makes me feel better. “No,” I say again. “I’m not hungry.”

This time, his knocking is slow, methodical, and thoughtful. “Little rabbit,” Fox admonishes. “Are we really going to do this?”

“Yeah,” I reply stubbornly. “Yeah, we’re really going to do this. If you want me to come down to dinner, then you’ll⁠—”

I don’t expect the door to open. Even more shocking, Fox just strides inside, his dark eyes on mine. I stumble backward until my back hits the wall. Then Fox is crowding me against it, and his smile is just a little less friendly than usual as he leans on his arm to cage me in.

“I’ll have to come in here and get you?” he suggests, chuckling as his eyes dance with a dark mirth. “Was that what you were going to say to me, Sadie-Rae?”

It takes a second, and a few inhales, before I can whisper, “Yeah. That’s what I was going to say.”

“Well, here I am. Inviting you to dinner.” He leans forward, his nose brushing mine. “You’re making this very hard on yourself, you know. But I think maybe that’s what I like about you.” One hand comes up to stroke down my cheek, but I don’t have anywhere to go to get away from him. I certainly don’t have the guts to shove his hand away. Not with my heart racing like a terrified rabbit’s.

“I really don’t want to go,” I murmur at last, shivering under the feeling of the pads of his fingers on my skin. “Please, Fox⁠—”

“You need to eat. Deacon said you puked outside, and you haven’t eaten well since we found you.” His tone is kind, but that doesn’t make this any better. Before I can respond, the Wolf Lake sheriff suddenly grabs me, throwing me over his shoulder and ignoring my indignant shriek.

“Did he even bother explaining it to you?” Fox asks as he strides down the hallway. I feel him take the stairs, the bouncing is disconcerting, and I have to grab onto his flannel shirt for stability.

Not that he’s dropped me yet. Between the two of them, his grip on me always feels incredibly stable and safe, though Deacon is no slouch when it comes to carrying me like a sack of potatoes through the Shaw property.

Finally, Fox sets me down in the dining room, and I know better than to do something stupid when I don’t have a weapon. Fox’s hand doesn’t leave the back of my neck, however, until I acquiesce to his silent nod and sit down hard in the same chair I ate breakfast in. Across from me, there are two places set, and Deacon is already sitting at one of them, sipping water from a glass.

“We don’t usually eat like this. You know, all formal and everything.” Deacon delivers the words along with a roll of his eyes that Fox glowers at as he joins him on his side of the table. “He’s doing all this for you.”

“Because you made us seem like monsters,” his adopted brother shoots back while he sits down.