Page 24 of The Examiner

But the essay is due in tomorrow.

Ludya Parak

I’ll do it this evening. So long as I get it in by midnight, that’s ‘before tomorrow’ right?

Patrick Bright

Finished my personal introduction. So cringey writing about myself!

Jonathan Danners

How personal do you get? On the one hand, it’s a job interview; on the other, well, my life experiences are why I’m pursuing this career change.

Patrick Bright

Get personal. I have.

Cameron Wesley

Business is all about who you know – and who knows you. Show them *you*.

Alyson Lang

Not doing the essay. I have anxiety over writing things.

Alyson Lang

And before anyone asks, Gela is fine with that.

Coursework Module: Assignment Two Tutor’s Report, 7 November 2023

Brief: Write an introduction to you, both as an artist and as a person. Imagine your essay as the first few paragraphs of a speculative email to a prospective employer (300–450 words).

Overview: For Assignment Two I gave the MA group a short writing task designed to mimic the type of brief email-pitch they will send out frequently in the real world. Many of the students are unused to expressing themselves in words, and in some cases this showed. However, we discussed the shortcomings of each during our role-play exercise, where we created an interview-style panel for each student in turn. The upshot was a lively and productive learning environment that saw everyone grow in confidence and ability.

Jemisha Badhuri

My name is Jemisha Badhuri. I am twenty-one years old. I achieved a BA with first-class Honours in Fine Art from West Middlesex. Unlike everyone else on this course, I have a career ahead of me. Not behind me, like Patrick. And I’m not taking it because my design business is on the rocks, like Ludya, or because it’s cheaper to steal use college art materials than buy my own, like Patrick says Alyson does. I’m also conscientious and engaged, unlike Cameron, who is combining this course with another job and probably doing neither very well.

I plan to work as a commercial sculptor and soundscape producer. The moment I touched a piece of clay, in primary school at the age of five, I knew it! This is my medium. No doubt, as my brothers like to tell me, because it’s a power trip. You can bend and shape clay any way you want. Say there are things you can’t control in other areas of your life – and if you’ve got four older brothers, believe me, this is a real possibility – then at least you are master of that piece of clay. Once you’ve manipulated and fired it, good or bad, it will be that way for ever.

I discovered the potential of sound more recently. My BA course didn’t teach it and I’ve sent a long letter to the head of department there explaining why it should be included in the curriculum. Having said that, because so few artists realise sound is even a thing, I’ll have an advantage when I start my new business. I’ll make sculptures for corporate organisations and complement them with soundscapes. It’s the best of all worlds: clay can be anything you want it to be – sound is everything you could possibly imagine.

If you decide to employ me for the commission that I’m pretending exists for this essay, you will get a hard-working and creative 3D artist who thinks outside the box. But I also think inside the box, if that’s what you want. Because I know being a commercial sculptor means bending and shaping your artistic vision to your clients’ needs. For the duration of our time working together I will bend and shape my substantial creative powers to you. In short, I am the best person for this job.

Tutor’s Report

Initially I rejected this essay because it contained an unsubstantiated accusation against another student. Ms Badhuri subsequently changed the word ‘steal’ to ‘use’ and resubmitted the work. While I appreciate the student’s willingness and ability to apply her skills to her client’s needs, I felt the essay was a missed opportunity to examine more deeply her inspirations and motivations, which would help a potential employer understand and engage with her artistic direction. Jem was made aware of the pitfalls of negative marketing when I asked her to read out her essay to the class. While one sells oneself in an interview, it should never be at the expense of other candidates. Such comments reflect far worse on the person making them. Grade: C

Patrick Bright

How difficult is this? I haven’t written proper sentences and paragraphs for years. I’ll introduce myself and why I applied for this course. I was born in Schull, which is on the south-west coast of Ireland and it’s pronounced ‘skull’, as in cranium. It’s a beautiful place, but I joined a friend who was going to work in London – this is in the late 80s. I got a job at an art-supplies shop and I’m still there. When the owner retired, I used my inheritance and bought him out. It’s in an old parade of shops dating back to the Middle Ages in a back street by Leicester Square. It’s called Modern Art. Terrible name, but it was opened in the 60s and its reputation is so strong, why change? I’ve always sketched and painted on the side, but at my age it’s now or never. A few things happened and they made me think about what I should do for the rest of my life. I realised I want to give up the shop and become an artist, for a few years before I retire. Just to have done it, you know?

Gela was an occasional customer. It was ages before I realised she was a tutor at Royal Hastings. During one of our chats I mentioned my dream of working for myself, going back to Schull, living by the sea. She suggested I apply for this MA. It sounded good. I wanted to approach my art from a commercial angle, simply to sustain it. The commitment is only a year and, with the two good shop girls I’ve got now, I can run the store alongside the coursework.

Tutor’s Report

Patrick introduced himself well, but failed to sell his artistic skills or his approach to work. It would be hard to see why a potential client would choose him over a candidate with greater insight into their own professional offering and greater marketing skills. Grade: C–