The emotions he’d been pushing, pushing, pushing down for the last few days welled up inside him, making his chest tight, his eyes hot. The telltale tingling began in his fingers, sweat prickling along the back of his neck, his stomach diving through the floor. He gulped in a breath, but it sounded like a sob.
Oh fuck oh fuck oh fuck.
His vision blurred. He pushed away from the door, half turning, scrambling for the handle. He had to get out of here. Needed to go, get away. He couldn’t let her see him like this. All broken and bruised and bleeding, his guts spilled on the floor.
His fucking fingers wouldn’t cooperate, he couldn’t get a grip on the knob. The tsunami of emotions crashed through him. The waves of pain and disappointment and shame smothered him, pulling him down, down, down into the dark. Unable to hold on against the onslaught, he gave in, sinking to his knees on the carpet.
Another sob escaped him, followed by another and then another, all of them piling on, one after the other, until it felt like they would never stop. Everything he’d been holding inside burst free. He leaned his forehead against the door, praying that somehow, it would disappear and he could escape.
And then she was there, wrapping her arms around him, pulling him against her. He wanted to fight it, wanted to pull away, run away, but he wasn’t strong enough. Gulping in a breath, his chest burning, he twisted around, wrapping his arms around her, burying his face against her neck.
She made a cooing sound, running her hand up and down his back. “It’s okay, I’ve got you.” Her voice was thick with emotion.
He kept his eyes closed, not wanting to see the pity on her face, and let go. Tears scalded his cheeks, sobs racked his body. His chest ached so badly he could barely breathe. Every cell in his body hurt, in that soul battered way.
She held him tight, her cheek pressed against the top of his head. Her hand continued the slow glide along his spine. The feel of her hands on him was more soothing than anything he’d ever felt. No one had ever held him like this. Not his mother, not his ex-wife. Like he was cared for, worthy, loved.
They stayed there for a long time, him holding on to her like if he let go, she’d disappear, her rubbing his back and whispering soothing words in his ear. The pain in his chest lessened, his tears dried, and yet, he couldn’t bring himself to let her go.
She pressed a kiss to the top of his head, running her hand through his hair, urging him to look at her. He didn’t want to, for many reasons, but mostly because, he didn’t want the moment to end.
But he couldn’t hide forever. He lifted his head.
Her eyes were red, tear tracks on her pink cheeks. A piercing ache carved through his chest at seeing her so upset. He didn’t like her to be sad.
“I’m so sorry,” she said, her voice thick. She leaned forward and pressed a kiss to his forehead. He closed his eyes, not wanting to see the terrible sympathy in her gaze any longer.
She pressed a kiss to each of his eyelids. He was sure could taste the tears clinging to his lashes. A light kiss to the tip of nose made the corner of his mouth twitch.
And then she kissed his mouth.
It was nothing but a light brush of her lips, but it felt like so much more. He wanted it to be so much more. Needed it to be so much more.
She must have sensed his need, because she pressed her lips to his again. This time, it was more than a gentle brush. Her mouth moved over his, her lips soft, but insistent. He kissed her back, part of him knowing this was a mistake, the rest of him not caring, because it meant he got to kiss and touch her one more time.
Her tongue brushed against his lips, seeking entrance. He groaned and opened for her. She tasted like peppermint and Alex and home. He shivered, tightening his arms around her, as if he could hold onto her forever.
She slid her hands down his neck and across his shoulders. His skin burned, the heat of her touch charring right to his bones. Her fingers trailed across his pecs, dipped down to brush against his abs. The muscles in his torso tensed, need, sudden and violent rushing through him so fast, it left him light headed.
He broke off the kiss, the breath heaving and in out of his lungs. She was staring at him, her lips swollen, her cheeks flushed, her eyes charcoal. So fucking beautiful he could hardly breathe.
“I need you, wildcat.” His voice sounded like he’d guzzled a handful of glass.
She swallowed. He couldn’t tear his gaze from the long column of her throat. Her tongue peeked out, wetting her lower lip. She blew out a shaky breath.
Then, her hand slipped lower. Over his belt buckle and then slower still. She cupped him, giving his cock a squeeze.
He groaned, the sound low and rough, and leaned forward. Planted his lips on her neck, swiping his tongue along her sweet and salty skin. She shivered and tilted her head. He took advantage, using his lips and tongue on her soft flesh. Every time he nipped with his teeth, she squeezed his cock until it was like a steel rod in his pants.
She fumbled to undo his belt. He reached down the help her. The clank of the buckle sounded loud in the quiet room. He popped the button on his pants and dragged the zipper down. She slipped her hand into the waistband of his boxer briefs, her fingers brushing against the wet, aching tip of his cock. His hips jumped, seeking more of her touch.
He slid his hands under her skirt, running his fingers up her thighs. She wasn’t wearing any stockings or tights, so it was nothing but hot, bare skin. He brushed her inner thighs, his touch light and teasing, until she was squirming, her own hips rocking in a subtle invitation.
She wrapped her hand around his cock and gave a tug. He moaned into her neck, thrust into her grip. Her fingers on him felt so fucking good. It had been way too long. She squeezed him perfectly, just the right amount of pressure. It sent heat sizzling through his veins. When she rubbed the head with her palm on the upstroke, stars burst behind his eyes.
He pulled the edge of her panties aside, dipping his fingers into the folds of her pussy. She made that beautiful, sexy mewling noise in the back of her throat. He sucked hard on the spot where her neck met her shoulder, loving the way she squirmed, pressed her pussy against his fingers.
God, he’d missed her so fucking much. It hadn’t been that long in reality, but it felt like forever since they were together. He pushed two fingers inside her, needing to feel all of her. She was still impossibly hot and wet. He circled his thumb over her clit, pressing firmly.