Page 101 of Untroubled Heart

“Does she know?” I will the fragility in my words to hold steady. I will not break in front of him.

“Is she talking to us?” My stomach aches knowing this woman is undoubtedly about to be hit with the same kind of hurt my mother has slowly clawed herself out of.

“Come on, Dad. For once in your life, tell someone the truth.” He continues to stare at me as the colour drains from the woman’s face.

“Dad?” she asks.

My father’s face changes from cautious to mollified as he turns to her. “I’ve never seen this girl.” He rubs an arm soothingly up and down her arm as tears sting my eyes. I could pretend I wasn’t hurt over my father’s rejection when it felt like my decision to deny our relationship, but having him completely deny my existence from his world crushes me in a way I’m not prepared for, in a way I hate.

I step onto the footpath, stopping right in front of him, but talking to the woman.

“My name’s Callista Moore. I’ve been his daughter for twenty-three years, a relationship I refuse to acknowledge any further. My mother, Elena Moore, has loved him for nearly thirty years. They also have a son together. We were under the impression he worked on an oil rig, which kept him offshore most of the time. If you’re learning any of this for the first time right now, I’m truly sorry.”

“Callie—”

I hold my hand up, stopping my father from saying whatever lies and excuses he was ready to unleash.

“You disgust me,” I spit, finally meeting his hazel eyes, thankful mine match the blue of my mother’s. “In case it wasn’t clear, I want nothing to do with you. And stay the fuck away from my mum.”

A loud slap is the only other sound I hear as my feet hit the pavement, and I get into my car. I manage to keep my tears at bay for the entire drive back to the office, parking in the underground lot so I can take the elevator straight up to the third floor, my chest feeling like it’s on the brink of caving in the entire ride up.

My skin is crawling, lungs aching as I struggle to breathe. I pace my office, not knowing whether I want to sit, stand, or scream.

Mason’s office door is open, but he’s not back yet. I need him. Tears roll down my cheeks as I walk into his office, surrounded by the comfort of the mint and patchouli scent he left behind.

It’s not until I drop into his chair, elbows resting on the desk, that I finally let the hurt roam free. My father. His lies and betrayal. The utter rejection is not worth my time, but I can’t help but mourn what I never had. Why could he never love me? Love my mother?

I hate him. Hate the power his manipulation commands. I should be mad enough to be immune to the grief. He’s never given a shit about me or my family. He was never truly a part of us, but that doesn’t stop the agony.

My jaw aches from the intensity with which it trembles. I wipe away the tears, nausea rising in my throat from the onslaught of emotions.

Mason’s emails are open on the screen beside me. I gloss over them, looking for nothing in particular except something else to read so my mind can have a reprieve from its own spiralling thoughts.

An email at the bottom has a cold chill snaking up my spine as my eyes lock on the name in the preview. It’s from Mason’s lawyer, Anna, talking about my ex. Maybe he ended up reaching out to her when Derek was still stalling on signing the paperwork.

I double click the email, bringing it up on the screen as my eyes scan the contents.

Two million dollars.

No contact.

Transfer complete.

I scroll through the conversation thread where Anna talks about meeting with Derek to propose a separate arrangement with Mason. One in which my ex is given a single payout to leave Navie and me in peace. There’s another document where Derek has signed an NDA to never speak about the agreement between them, or he’ll have to repay the two million dollars. If he reaches out to myself or Navie, he also has to repay the two million dollars.

What the fuck is this? Did Derek go behind my back to Mason, or did Mason seek him out? Is this the only reason Derek signed our paperwork, because Mason made the problem go away?

My breath comes in harder, and my heart pounds against my chest until it hurts. I read the email again.

It’s not like I want to deal with Derek in any way, but I won’t stop Navie from reaching out in the future if she wants to. There’s nothing that states he’s not allowed to respond to her; he’s just not allowed to initiate contact.

I slump back in the chair, not knowing if I should hold my head or my heart as I process everything.

I hate the thought of Mason stepping in. Did he think I couldn’t handle it on my own? And Derek doesn’t deserve money. He fucking took a payout in exchange for completely erasing his daughter from his life.

What if Mason and I don’t work out, and he’s just forked over two million dollars to make my ex go away? What if he thinks I’m not worth it? What if my love for Mason slowly turns into obligation?

It’s why my mother never left my father, even when she knew he didn’t make her happy. He didn’t even need money to leave us behind. We were never good enough from the start.