Page 68 of Katherine the Vixen

“I…” She faltered and they both came to a halt. This might be one confession too many.

“Tell me, please, I want you to feel you can tell me anything. I don’t want you to be ashamed.”

She wasn’t ashamed, but she knew that he would hate her answer. Still, she could not lie to him, not after all the misunderstandings between them.

“I wanted my first time to be special, with a man I was going to marry and spend my life with, not a hurried affair with someone I barely knew.”

“Oh, God.”

Just as she had feared, Siaspar looked about to retch.

“I’m sorry. But you asked,” she said in a small voice. “And I didn’t want to lie.”

“I know, sweetheart, and I thank you for your honesty.” He gave her cheek a brush. “But surely you understand why I am appalled by what you said. Because, in the end, your first time was a hurried affair with a man you didn’t know.”

“Yes. But that man was tricked into doing it, which makes all the difference. He now wants to marry me and spend the rest of his life with me. He is certainly not a stranger any longer.” She started walking again, eager to reach the spot where they could forget all about their troubles. “So please, let the poor man forget what happened, or, at least, believe me when I say this first time was not the horrific experience he thinks it was.”

Siaspar took in a deep breath. “I do believe you. You have told me as much already and I think you mean it.”

“I do,” Katherine was delighted to see that he was prepared to believe her.

“I thank you for your generosity. You allowed me to make my peace with what I did to you, and I have the weakness to take your word for it.”

“It’s not a weakness but a strength to be able to trust people.”

He smiled. “Indeed.”

It wasn’t long before Katherine came to another halt. They had reached the middle of the woods and were now standing in a space big enough to let the sunshine in but small enough to be private.

“Here we are.”

Suddenly she felt very shy. The meadow looked different than in her memory. But perhaps that was not surprising, as she had not been here for years. As a young girl, she had often come on May Day, to dream that a mysterious boy would one day steal her heart. It had become her refuge from her normal, sometimes uninspiring life. No one, not even her sister, knew that she came here and would stare at the sky, using the clouds to try and picture a man who was neither the miller’s son nor the weaver’s nephew or any of the other lads from the village, but a man she did not know, a stranger who would come and whisk her away from a life that had become too predictable for her.

Now, her fantasy had come true. That very man was here in front of her, so tall, so brooding, so real, a man of flesh and bones, not the romantic conjuring of her girlish imagination. She shivered. In her dreams, the men spread their cloaks on the ground for her and Siaspar delighted her by doing just that, unbidden.

“This is perfect, thank you for taking me here. Let’s sit a while.”

She did sit. And as soon as he joined her, they kissed. First with passion, then with reverence, then tenderness, and then passion again.

Soon, they were lying down side by side. In that position, the difference in height between them was negligeable, and she could stare into Siaspar’s incredible eyes. They seemed to be glowing with a new intensity now that he had admitted his love for her.

“Please let me see you,” Katherine murmured, pulling at his clothes. She should never have been so bold or so demanding but desire was making her forget everything. “I have wanted to see you for weeks.”

On their two nights together, she had not seen his body, only felt the taut muscles rippling under the smooth skin. She was desperate to see if he was as arousing as she imagined him to be, even if she suspected that he was.

“No, my love. As much as I’d like to, I cannot indulge you, not here.” He stilled her hand, trapping it against his iron chest. “I do not want us to be caught. If anyone should walk into the meadow while we are naked they would see an opportunity for mischief. I cannot risk exposing you to danger thus. But soon, I swear. When I have you in a secure place, we will do everything you want.”

“Then let me see your arm, at least.” She pushed back the sleeve of his tunic to reveal the scar on his left wrist. “My God,” she cried out.

Katherine was shocked. Somehow, the scar looked worse than the wound had and brought home the atrocity of Lady Malpas’ attempt on his life. It was deep and ragged, as if she had not just run the blade across the veins but sawed at his flesh repeatedly.

Siaspar lifted the hand holding him to his mouth and kissed the palm, lingering on the gesture.

“You did what no one else has ever done for me. I owe my life to you. Your presence of mind that day saved me. I know not of any other lady who would have acted with such self-possession. In all probability they would have fainted at the sight of blood or screamed until it was too late to save me.”

“Yes. But you are forgetting I’m no lady.” Katherine could barely think straight, never mind talk. The kisses on the tender skin of her hand were doing odd things to her insides.

“Thank God, you’re not or I would be dead right now, and not lying down next to the most arousing woman I have ever met. A much more inspiring proposition for a man, as I’m sure you’ll agree.” Releasing her hand, he kissed her on the lips gently. “Catrin. My love. My savior. My heart’s desire.”