Page 90 of Playboy’s Purgatory

“I’m having a house built on the compound,” I tell her honestly. “It’s been part of the plan for a while, but I had to wait for the schedule to work and it’s being built now. I need to finalize some of the finishes.”

“You’re having a house built on the compound,” she says every word slowly like she’s trying to comprehend how they make sense all together, “and you need to finalize some of the finishes?”

“Why are you saying it like that?”

“I’m just trying the words out in my mouth because at first blush they seem utterly ridiculous. The second time through wasn’t much better, honestly,” she sasses me.

“Why are they ridiculous?”

“Because they imply that you want me to help you pick those finishes.”

“I do.”

She blinks at me before barking out a sharp laugh full of disbelief. “Which is why it’s ridiculous. There is no reason for you to want or need my input in your home.”

My eyes bore into hers, unwilling to let go of her blue-eyed gaze. Her breathing starts to pick up, and I can see the truth underneath this moment sink into her bones.

She’s mine.

This will be our home.

Maybe not anytime soon, but one day. It will be.

Which means she should have a say in the fucking finishes. At minimum. Hell, she can furnish the entire thing as far as I’m concerned.

“I’m here,” she sighs, “but the most I can offer is to tell you if something is atrocious.”

I hold my hands up in surrender. I’ll take it. If she can keep all her opinions to herself, I’ll be shocked.

“I just don’t understand why you want my opinion?” She sounds more curious than skeptical.

“Do you want the answer you can easily accept, or do you want the full truth?”

“Full truth,” she says it with certainty.

“I know we’re not there yet, and you might deny there being anything more than there is between us, but I want to make sure that you love this house. It’s not difficult to picture us building a life there. You. Me. Vanessa. Maybe more kids if you’re interested.” I wink at her and one side of her mouth tips up. “No matter how long it takes to get there, it’s the future I want.”

Lara is staring at me with wide eyes and parted lips. I frown slightly when I realize she’s not breathing.

Just when I reach out for her, she takes a deep, heaving breath. “You’ve lost your mind,” she wheezes out the words.

“No,” I shake my head, “I really haven’t.”

“You just said you picture a future, a whole damn life, with me and it involves the house you’re having built,” her tone borders on shrill.

She presses a hand to her chest and shakes her head like she’s trying to dislodge my words. When she looks back up at me, I know it didn’t work.

“You said you wanted the full truth, I gave it to you,” my words are soft and coaxing as I reach out and cup the side of her neck.

Her eyes slide closed and she nods, but it’s not acceptance. Just an understanding that she did, in fact, ask for the complete truth.

Whether she wants to hear it or not.

Whether she wants to accept it or not.

Whether she wants to embrace it or not.

I can see her struggling and I know pushing her won’t help. Not right now. What needed to be said was said; I can leave it at that today.