Page 47 of Derecho

I almost asked her to marry me last night while she spiraled about never being chosen. Never being loved. I’d almost told her right then and there that we should get married. That I’d keep her safe and care for her and the baby for as long as she would let me.

What the hell had I been thinking? Jumping from one fucked up situation to another with me wasn’t what she needed. I mean, Christ, we’d barely been friends just a few weeks ago.

Lainey groaned, her hand running the length of her belly, before her eyes opened.

“Hey. You’re still here.” Her soft smile shifted to wide eyes. I wanted to see how she’d slept. How she was feeling about everything now that she’d gotten some sleep. But her smile distracted me.

“Yeah. I must have fallen asleep, too. Your little alarm clock kicked me awake this morning.”

“You’ll have to get better about ignoring those kicks, like I have.” Her eyes dropped before flying back up to mine. “Oh, I have to go to the bathroom!”

Lainey rolled away, sitting up with a groan as she pushed to her feet and made her way out of the bedroom with a waddle.

I waited for her to shut the door across the hall before I made my way to my room, stripping out of yesterday's clothing and slipping into clean ones for today. By the time I had my shirt over my head and was heading downstairs, the bathroom door was back open, and Lainey was halfway into her room.

“I hope I didn’t drool on you,” she said a few minutes later as she walked into the kitchen, her fingers digging into her back. She was wearing stretchy black shorts that fit over her belly, and a sunshine-yellow shirt tucked up under her breasts. From straight on, she barely looked pregnant, but when she turned to the side to sit at the table, the outfit really accentuated how round her baby bump was.

“Nope, no drool. Some snoring, though,” I teased.

Her mouth turned down. “Sorry about that.”

“I grew up sharing a room with Beau. Your snores aren’t even in the top hundred wildest noises I’ve heard come from a sleeping person. He had night terrors for a few years, and the things he would mumble….”

“I don’t think I’ve ever heard someone talk in their sleep.”

“Maybe not talk, but your little Martian seems to not be afraid to say hello to people.”

She groaned. “I’m really sorry about the kicks.”

“Don’t be. Jessie and Violet let me feel the babies a couple of times, and it’s always so wild to me.”

“Well, you can feel any time you want. I wouldn’t mind sharing the crazy way this invader likes to dance with someone who finds it fascinating. I’m more than ready for it to be a memory.”

I laughed. “So, did you sleep okay?”

“Yeah. I can’t remember the last time I slept that deeply. I think getting it all out just let my mind finally lean into being safe here.”

I nodded, trying not to puff my chest at knowing she’d felt safe while I’d been lying beside her. “That was the first time in a long time I didn’t…”

Her eyes narrowed, and then she nodded in understanding. “You have nightmares?”

“Yeah. Not always, but they’ve been back lately. Not last night, though. I slept right through the night. Slept really great. Feels like I could run a marathon today.” My hand tightened on my cane. “Well, walk one, at least.”

“A walk does sound nice,” Lainey yawned, stretching her hands over her head. “I think I need to get the blood flowing in my body.”

“Then let's do it.”

“What? Really?” she asked, her eyes flicking out the back window before narrowing as they landed back on me. “I missed out on meeting the horses yesterday. Maybe we could go to the barn?”

The memory of Lainey talking about the springs popped into my mind. “Actually, I have a better idea.”

She crossed her arms. “As long as it’s outside, I think I’m game. I need some sunshine in my life today. And a new plan to talk to your sister.”

“Perfect. Sunshine I can do. And I might have something up my sleeve for you and Jess.”

She smiled. “Imagine two-week-ago Lach saying that.”

Lainey was right. Just a few weeks ago, I couldn’t wrap my mind around walking out the door. And here I was, getting ready to text my family to meet us at the springs. “Put on some sunscreen, Trouble. And I’ll take care of the rest.”