Page 28 of Who The Hell Are You?

“What?” He’s caught me completely off guard.

Cass laughs, sitting forward to push the bag closer to me. “I saw it and thought of you.”

Now it’s my turn to blush, and I don’t stop even after I pull out the vampire dark romance hardback and a soft plushie which is a latte cup, cuddling a pumpkin. “You bought me a pumpkin spiced latte plushie and vampire smut?” I sound breathy. I can’t look at him. “Cassie, this—this is so nice. Thank you. You didn’t have to—”

“I wanted to.”

“Why?” I finally look at him, searching those whisky eyes. His expression, whilst soft, is deadly serious.

“Like I said, gifts are my love language. I really like buying you things.”

“Does it…kinda do it for you?” I say low, but the bark of laughter he lets out, before running his fingers through his unruly curls is not quiet.

“Yeah, it kinda does. I really like taking care of people and it's incredibly satisfying knowing I put that smile there.”

He's right, I am smiling. I probably look broken with how wide it is. Clutching the plushie to my chest, I move the wooden chair I'm sitting on closer to him, until our legs press together and I'm able to take one of his hands. He relaxes with an audible sigh, the contact soothing him as much as it does me.

“Cassie, you sweet, sweet man. I want to ask–I mean, I need to know, what is it you want between us?”

His thumb runs across my knuckle and the small contact is heaven. “I know we've only just met, and I've never…” he stops and I think he's considering his words. “I've never dated a guy. But I'm not scared to and I want to–I want to date you. If you want to! Obviously. I'd like to get to know you better.” Sitting back like he's laid it all out there, he smiles, messing up the curls on top of his head.

“I haven't been in a relationship period,” I admit, still clinging to my new comfort. “I was kind of a mess, when I came out and started experimenting. I never settled and I got messed around. I’ve dated, but it never…progressed. Taking things slow would be really, really great. If you wanted to.” There. I put on my big boy pants and told him how I feel. I also want to go really slow so he doesn't cut things off with masked me.

Jesus.

Am I a bad person?

I don't want to lie to Cassie, but he didn't want me to take the mask off either. Before he can say anything, I steer the conversation in a direction that will allow us to keep our anonymous bedroom time. “Have you ever done anything with a guy?”

If he really regrets last night, he won't say anything; but to my surprise he bristles, but tells the truth. “I have…recently.”

“That's great!” My voice is ridiculously high and I do remind myself that the person he's done things with is myself. I can't be jealous of myself. “As someone that's been there, it's good to explore your sexuality and find out what you like.”

Cass nods, but his eyes are wide, taking every word out of my mouth like it's his new gospel, so I continue.

“Don't feel like you need to stop doing that, if we take things slow.” Unless it's with anyone other than me. “I had lots of casual sex before I decided I wanted something more serious.” Not a lie, but things will very soon become not casual with masked me and this version of me. “So, yeah. I'm very interested in seeing where this goes, but don't feel like you need to give me a commitment ring or anything.” Lies, lies, lies. If he wanted to pledge his undying exclusivity to me right now I'd take it.

He looks a little like an owl, blinking and not saying anything. Ah, shit. I've fucked this up. I grip his hand a little tighter, but before I can try to create some sort of word pit to crawl myself out of, he comes back to himself.

“What will you do?”

I frown. “What do you mean?”

“Will you…see other people too?”

I snort, unwillingly. “No.”

“Why not?”

I shrug. “I haven't been with someone in a long time. So I'll go on as I was, just seeing you now.” Giving him a reassuring smile, I do think I've spooked him a little, even though he smiles back. This probably isn’t what he expected when he asked me to date him, but one day hopefully fucking soon it’ll all make sense. Cass didn’t want me to take the mask off which meant he enjoyed it just as much as I did, so in this twisted way, I’m preserving our little dark fantasy. What I want to do is stand on this table and accept everything he’s willing to give me, but for now I just have to play it cool and try to keep a manageable lid on the little white fibs I need to tell. We’re playing a game, but I won’t ever lie to him and everything will be revealed in good time.

Thankfully a waitress saves me. She puts down cups of coffee with whipped cream, and two gingerbread men. This fucking man. My heart squeezes and I clutch the plushie even harder, gazing over the coffee as she places everything on the table.

“Cassie…” I whisper as she leaves. “No one's ever done anything like this for me, before.” I have to push down a lot of emotions as I look up at him, and the heartbreakingly gorgeous smirk he gives me, does me in.

Closing the short space, I entwine my fingers into the back of his hair and crash his lips to mine. The world stops. My heart definitely stops, my breathing too as my entire being aligns to only fit this man. He smells like sandalwood and amber, his lips are soft but the stubble around them scratches my own cheeks in the best way.

He's still for only a second before Cass kisses me back, his lips consuming me whole. His hand finds my jaw and he drags me into him, running his tongue over my bottom lip so I open. Tingles shock my entire body when our tongues touch, and I don't care that we're in a coffee shop. I want to do this forever.