Page 75 of The Work Husband

I rummaged in my bag and located my phone again. Before she left the flat, Ava had said, almost tentatively, Do you want to take my number? In case we need to talk?

At the time, I’d been so blindsided with shock at what she’d told me that I couldn’t imagine ever wanting to see or talk to her again, although I’d entered her number in my phone anyway.

But I wanted to talk to her now.

As I stepped out of the building into the sunlit street, I pressed send on a text message.

‘It’s no problem.’ Ava smiled at me over her cappuccino. ‘I’m off to the theatre later, so there was no point going home after work. I’ve joined a group of single people who meet up once a month and do different activities. I’m the youngest by about thirty years, but it’s good fun.’

I looked at her with respect. Somehow, I’d never thought of her other than in the context of her being Sam’s ex, and more recently as a survivor of terrible trauma. But of course she was more than that – she was a person with a life and a job and presumably a family and other friends.

Seeing my surprise, she went on, ‘Elizabeth, my therapist, encouraged me to join. I’m a bit nervous meeting new people, so this seemed like a safe way to do it. Especially since I’m not ready for online dating yet – or most probably ever.’

She grimaced and then laughed, and after a second, I joined in.

‘It’s amazing you can laugh about it,’ I said. ‘I’m like… if something like that happened to me, I don’t think I’d ever laugh again.’

‘Oh, you would.’ She smiled. ‘It takes a while, but you get there. Everyone does.’

Maybe I’d get over losing Sam, eventually, and laugh and move on. I’d have to – I had no choice, any more than Ava had had a choice about carrying on with her life after what happened to her.

Politely, I asked her a bit about the show she was going to see, and she told me, but I was conscious of time passing and the need to talk properly to her before she headed off to meet her singles group.

‘So, I…’ I began, once I’d bought us each a second coffee. ‘I don’t know if you really want to hear this, or if it’s appropriate to tell you or whatever… but Sam and I have split up.’

Her face fell in genuine distress. ‘Oh no. Not a trial thing any more?’

‘It doesn’t look that way. We still need to work out all the practicalities. But I don’t think he’s… I don’t think he’ll forgive me for the way things turned out.’

‘Georgia, that’s… I’m so sorry. That’s awful. I feel like it’s because of me.’

Vehemently, I shook my head. ‘It’s not. I’d have thought that, a few weeks back. But it’s really not. I did a stupid thing and it all kind of spiralled out of control, and here we are.’

‘You don’t have to tell me what happened,’ she said. ‘But if you want to, it’s okay. I’ll listen.’

Hesitantly, with a load of backtracking, but as honestly as I could, I explained to her about Jamie’s idea and how it had all backfired.

‘At first Sam didn’t seem to be taking any notice,’ I said. ‘But he told me afterwards he thought it was all fake.’

‘So if he knew that, what was the problem?’ Ava asked.

‘Apart from him realising I was acting like a total dick?’ I grimaced.

‘Well, I wouldn’t have put it quite that way myself.’ Ava’s smile was gentle.

‘There isn’t another way to put it, unfortunately,’ I admitted. ‘I was a complete idiot. But I was so wound up and insecure and jealous about you, when Jamie – Jamie Baldwin, the guy at work whose idea this all was – suggested it, it seemed like a great idea, and then by the time I realised it wasn’t, it was too late.’

‘Why? Did something happen?’ Speaking more softly now, she leaned across the table.

Slowly, I nodded. ‘I… This might be triggering for you to hear. I probably shouldn’t be telling you. If you want me to, I’ll stop.’

‘It’s okay. I’m kind of used to hearing difficult things.’

‘I guess he’s liked me for a while. Or not liked me so much as wanted to take me away from Sam. Not because of me but just to prove he could.’

As I spoke, I realised I was confronting a truth I hadn’t been able to see before.

‘He’s kind of a player,’ I went on. ‘It’s like, he’s a good-looking guy. He could have any woman he wanted. But he wants the ones he can’t have, and the ones he can, he uses and then dumps. But I thought I was different. I thought he and I were friends.’